My son is quite hyper but very distractable. Both of these are frustrating to parent (e.g. I send him to get his shoes on so we can leave for school and he forgets why he is upstairs and forgets to come back.) But the issues that are more difficult are the ODD tendencies and the MOST difficult is the anxiety. He goes from happy to frustrated to explosive in seconds. He has just changed schools - as in today is his 2nd day. At the other school we were frequently late. I let it go for a number of reasons but now he is in a public school and it becomes a totally different issue. He changed schools because his teacher was abusive and the atmosphere at the school was toxic. Neither of us could take it anymore. But his anxiety level rose to a point that is controlled both of our lives. Last Friday, when I woke him for school he began raging and pounding the bed, screaming, "I don't want to go to school, I don't want to go to school!!!" So I decided he would never go back to that school again. One of the issues we have been dealing with for one year, (since he switched medications to Vyvanse) is a struggle with falling asleep. Last week, when the message of how destructive his school was finally cut through the fog, I realized that this sleep issue was related to the anxiety. Last night, we had gone to a wrestling match and on the way home he fell asleep. As soon as we got home at 7:45 he asked to go to bed. He has NEVER done that. But he fell asleep immediately! And he slept until almost 7am. I think the months of anxiety has taken a toll. It will be interesting to see how much this anxiety eases as the days go by. One of the things that is a problem for us is that even though we were at the breakfast table with plenty of time to get to school early we ended up getting there with no 60 seconds to spare. Getting the last couple of things done ignites the oppositional tendencies and the anxiety and we inevitably end up yelling at each other until we get into the car by which time he is screaming and crying. Not a great way to start the day (it will often end in a similar way.) I have finally decided to find information and support online. I don't know any other parents dealing with similar issues. I am a widow. My husband died when our son was 7 months old. The fighting about every single issue is so exhausting but the thing that I stumbled across yesterday that was the most helpful was a list of questions that included one that asked, "is your home destroyed?" YES!!! That above all things has been a nightmare for 5 years. That above everything else has taken a toll on me and controlled my life. Because - when my son is not in school I will do anything (not even consciously for several years) to figure out someplace to go rather than be at home - because if we are at home and my son is out of my sight he will destroy the room he is in. Only in the past 9 months have I gotten any portion of our house back in a manageable shape. That is the upstairs. You would not call it that today. But it is within 2 to 3 hours of being acceptable. My room has been a huge domping ground for so long. Because if I am cooking dinner or working on anything and he is not engaged or observed then he will turn every single vessel, drawer, closet upside down and inside out. And when faced with that on top of what is already insanely chaotic - it is simply more than I can deal with. I am exhausted and lonely and until I found this place I have had NOONE to talk to who might understand. I didn't come here so much to get advice as I did come to find people who understand and who have been through anything similar and who understand how exhausting and frustrating and personally draining it all is. One of the MOST draining parts is that others DONT understand and see it all as a discipline issue. Because they don't understand I don't even bother trying. I just save myself the possibilty of being judged. I bet that is familiar to many of you. Thanks for letting me vent. It is a great relief to find this forum.