I'm brand new here so first a bit of history. When my son was 7 I found out that his father had been physically abusing both of my sons (7 and 12 at the time) and removed him from our home. The state's way of "helping" was to remove both of my children from my home and place them with my brother, who has had custody of my now 14 year old since then. Jacob (my son) returned home to me 8 months ago. During the time he was with my brother we were in regular contact through phone and email, and he spent his summers with me. He has no contact with his father at all. When he first came home he was an amazing kid. Happy to be back with his mom, happy to be around extended family, well behaved and respectful for the most part. Now, things have changed. In the past 2 or 3 months Jacob has become angry and very defiant. He has been diagnosed with ODD but refuses counseling and/or medications. Instead, he's smoking pot and drinking with his friends. He's been in a bit of trouble with the police. We're waiting for a summons from the prosecutors office to find out what will happen with that. It was nothing overly serious, he simply went into a closed park after hours and got caught, but I'm hopeful it will give me the opportunity to get some court ordered help with him. I've tried restricting who he's with, where he goes, and when he can go - but that backfired. He sneaks out or becomes physically abusive to get out the door. He's bigger and stronger than I am, so I have no means of forcing him to stay here. He had a couple of airsoft guns that he was taking into town with him. He removed the orange tips from them and would act as though they were real guns. I was worried about him getting hurt (or killed!) by someone thinking they were real, so the guns were taken away and moved to another property - they're no longer in my home. Now, one of his friends who's a "good" kid has told me Jacob has another one that looks very real that he's keeping somewhere else so I can't take it. He's rude, disrespectful, and I'm so worried that it's keeping me up at night. ANY help, advice, suggestions - anything at all would be very appreciated. I'm at a loss and I really don't know what to do or where to turn.