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New here- is there ever an uphill??
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<blockquote data-quote="nlj" data-source="post: 627585" data-attributes="member: 17650"><p>Hello Sosad. Welcome to my world!</p><p>(if you read some of my past posts you will get the gist of my story)</p><p></p><p>My son is now 27, but he has been ranting to me about ethical, moral, ecological and political issues since the age of about 15. He is now a jobless, penniless, homeless 'eco-warrior' and lives in a farm squat in a forest with derelict farm buildings, vermin, no running water, heating or sanitation. He has long hair and a massive beard and dresses in rags covered in mud and he smells really bad. He does this because of his "beliefs" in the corruption and evil of society. He is cynical about everything and gets very angry about lots of issues which he can't change. He refuses to be part of society and he dislikes most people.</p><p></p><p>BUT... he tells me is is happy and he tells me how much he loves me and I have worked <em>really hard </em>to accept his choices in life. My son has suffered from depression for most of his adult life, but he is less distressed by depressive thoughts living as he is. As it is now Spring, he is currently living in a tree house that he built himself, on a riverbank and only accessible via a mile long track of mud that is knee-deep in places. I have visited him there.</p><p></p><p>I would say to you that my son is intelligent, he has a good degree from a good university, but he is driven by his righteous beliefs in everything that is wrong with the world. He is not taking drugs, not stealing or being violent in any way. I am extremely saddened to see him living as he is and to see the state that he is in... but, as I say, I am trying to accept things and to even embrace this drive that he has to live off the land and scavenge to survive and not be part of the 'nine-to-five, rent and bills, 2 kids and a wife' etc lifestyle that he despises.</p><p></p><p>We are all different. You can try to change your son and control him, or you can detach from the things that cause you pain and just accept him as he is and love him unconditionally. I do not give my son any money, it is his choice to live with no money, but he comes to stay here occasionally. </p><p></p><p>When he stays here we have made it clear that we will not tolerate his ranting or him trying to make me feel guilty because I eat meat etc. If he wants us to accept and not judge his choices in life then he must accept ours too. Your son is still at home with you. He may have high-minded ideas about the injustice in the world, etc. Living those ideas is a totally different thing. Life for my son is very tough and is taken up with survival mostly. Your son may just be going through a phase and may never reach the stage of my son. </p><p></p><p>I would say that he could be doing a lot worse. Reading other peoples' stories on this site has shown me that. My son is basically a decent, loving, caring, honest person. He is just deeply troubled by the world and the people in it.</p><p></p><p>Sending warm thoughts to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nlj, post: 627585, member: 17650"] Hello Sosad. Welcome to my world! (if you read some of my past posts you will get the gist of my story) My son is now 27, but he has been ranting to me about ethical, moral, ecological and political issues since the age of about 15. He is now a jobless, penniless, homeless 'eco-warrior' and lives in a farm squat in a forest with derelict farm buildings, vermin, no running water, heating or sanitation. He has long hair and a massive beard and dresses in rags covered in mud and he smells really bad. He does this because of his "beliefs" in the corruption and evil of society. He is cynical about everything and gets very angry about lots of issues which he can't change. He refuses to be part of society and he dislikes most people. BUT... he tells me is is happy and he tells me how much he loves me and I have worked [I]really hard [/I]to accept his choices in life. My son has suffered from depression for most of his adult life, but he is less distressed by depressive thoughts living as he is. As it is now Spring, he is currently living in a tree house that he built himself, on a riverbank and only accessible via a mile long track of mud that is knee-deep in places. I have visited him there. I would say to you that my son is intelligent, he has a good degree from a good university, but he is driven by his righteous beliefs in everything that is wrong with the world. He is not taking drugs, not stealing or being violent in any way. I am extremely saddened to see him living as he is and to see the state that he is in... but, as I say, I am trying to accept things and to even embrace this drive that he has to live off the land and scavenge to survive and not be part of the 'nine-to-five, rent and bills, 2 kids and a wife' etc lifestyle that he despises. We are all different. You can try to change your son and control him, or you can detach from the things that cause you pain and just accept him as he is and love him unconditionally. I do not give my son any money, it is his choice to live with no money, but he comes to stay here occasionally. When he stays here we have made it clear that we will not tolerate his ranting or him trying to make me feel guilty because I eat meat etc. If he wants us to accept and not judge his choices in life then he must accept ours too. Your son is still at home with you. He may have high-minded ideas about the injustice in the world, etc. Living those ideas is a totally different thing. Life for my son is very tough and is taken up with survival mostly. Your son may just be going through a phase and may never reach the stage of my son. I would say that he could be doing a lot worse. Reading other peoples' stories on this site has shown me that. My son is basically a decent, loving, caring, honest person. He is just deeply troubled by the world and the people in it. Sending warm thoughts to you. [/QUOTE]
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