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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 712617" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I am also an adoptive mom and wonder if attachment disorder was ever brought up. Because he has no self regulation at 16 i also wonder if birthmother drank and perhaps caused cogntive damage to him. I have one child who had crack in his system and is very fortunate to only have a form of autism and at 23 is able to follow rules and work and live on his own. He dodged many bullets but not all kids do.</p><p></p><p>Fetal alcohol effects is brain damage and the people who have it often cant follow rules, understand social norms or even remember rules day to day. Only a specialist could check for fetal alcohol effects, which is fetal alcohol syndrome without the Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) facial dysmorphia.</p><p></p><p> I feel it helps if we understand and adjust our expectations and then can accept our children who may be damaged from the womb.</p><p></p><p>I would take him for a neurology and neuro psychological deep evaluation. It is easy to misdiagnose attachment issues and neurological damage from drugs and alcohol because even psychiatrists dont look for it. It is not the norm. Many dont know tjat much about these common adoption issues.</p><p></p><p>From my research I know that many Eastern European orphans are damaged by in utero alcohol. It is worth checking out so that you can do the max and also see if your child maybe can not help his behavior. Then you can seek outside help. We did all this when we adopted our son. It still took time to see his potential vs. What he couldnt be expected to do. His diagnoses were many and wrong until we saw his first neuro psychologist.</p><p></p><p>I wish you tons of luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 712617, member: 1550"] I am also an adoptive mom and wonder if attachment disorder was ever brought up. Because he has no self regulation at 16 i also wonder if birthmother drank and perhaps caused cogntive damage to him. I have one child who had crack in his system and is very fortunate to only have a form of autism and at 23 is able to follow rules and work and live on his own. He dodged many bullets but not all kids do. Fetal alcohol effects is brain damage and the people who have it often cant follow rules, understand social norms or even remember rules day to day. Only a specialist could check for fetal alcohol effects, which is fetal alcohol syndrome without the Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS) facial dysmorphia. I feel it helps if we understand and adjust our expectations and then can accept our children who may be damaged from the womb. I would take him for a neurology and neuro psychological deep evaluation. It is easy to misdiagnose attachment issues and neurological damage from drugs and alcohol because even psychiatrists dont look for it. It is not the norm. Many dont know tjat much about these common adoption issues. From my research I know that many Eastern European orphans are damaged by in utero alcohol. It is worth checking out so that you can do the max and also see if your child maybe can not help his behavior. Then you can seek outside help. We did all this when we adopted our son. It still took time to see his potential vs. What he couldnt be expected to do. His diagnoses were many and wrong until we saw his first neuro psychologist. I wish you tons of luck. [/QUOTE]
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