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<blockquote data-quote="busywend" data-source="post: 40662" data-attributes="member: 391"><p>If you know he thinks in the here and now, you know that a punishment is only going to anger him. He can not rationalize that next time he better not do that (whatever it is he is being punished for) or he will get grounded. If he is impulsive, he certainly is NOT going to rationalize anything in the moment. </p><p></p><p>I did punish and punish and punish. It did nothing to help. I finally realized after my difficult child missed a birthday party (her own) and trick or treating in one year - along with many other punishments - that it was not doing ANY good to punish this kid and all it was accomplishing was she was missing out on her childhood, the experiences that I remember from my own childhood. She was stuck in her room for most of them. None of it ever worked. She never learned.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="busywend, post: 40662, member: 391"] If you know he thinks in the here and now, you know that a punishment is only going to anger him. He can not rationalize that next time he better not do that (whatever it is he is being punished for) or he will get grounded. If he is impulsive, he certainly is NOT going to rationalize anything in the moment. I did punish and punish and punish. It did nothing to help. I finally realized after my difficult child missed a birthday party (her own) and trick or treating in one year - along with many other punishments - that it was not doing ANY good to punish this kid and all it was accomplishing was she was missing out on her childhood, the experiences that I remember from my own childhood. She was stuck in her room for most of them. None of it ever worked. She never learned. [/QUOTE]
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