Hi everyone,
I came across your forum while searching for help on understanding ADHD and Aspergers. My 8 year old son has had quite the history of not being able to function well in a learning environment, even back to preschool and daycares before that. All his life I have had various people from these places, and family members, constantly telling me that "oh, he is adhd. Definitely. You should really do something about that. Soon." While giving me a look...
I was not convinced and so I tried finding other, more natural solutions, to help him behave better and understand consequences. These ranged from various vitamins to trying the elimination diet to trying every book out there on making kids behave with various versions of time-outs, reward systems galore, losing possessions, positive reinforcement. You name it, I likely tried it. by the way, his issues are strictly behavior, mainly social. His grades are perfect, he never requires any help beyond pushing him to actually finish it and turn in work. His standardized test scores have consistently been among the highest in his school.
Enter 2nd grade and at this point, I'm exhausted from our battles. In the first two weeks he nearly gets booted from the before/after school program and I am called to a meeting with his teacher. I'm done, fed up, can't take hearing it anymore. After an entire night crying about it, I took him to his pediatrician, laid it all out and begged for help. She ordered an ekg and a echo and blood tests and a couple weeks later, put him on Concerta (18). This was in October. He seemed to improve a bit, at least as far as impulsivity and aggressiveness goes. Calmed down quite a bit, but still extremely distractable. So it seemed.
His doctor did not want to manage his medications, not her specialty, so she referred us to a behavioral center to take over. It took seven weeks to get an initial appointment, and we had to meet twice with an intake specialist (an LPC). She filled out all the info from her questionaires and ordered additional bloodwork. In our second visit she pulled out a checklist and asked me to fill it out. It was for Aspergers.
Our third visit was with the psychiatrist to begin medication mgmt. While in the waiting room, the LPC came out to see us and pulled me aside. She told me he scored "off the charts" for Aspergers and went on to demonstrate some techniques with him to help me help him make eye contact, which he NEVER does, as well as to help me understand it. Suggested I learn more about it and informed the psychiatric of his score. 15 minutes later, my son is relatively calm in his office though thoroughly distracted by his "stuff" while he and I talk. He states he just "doesn't see it" for the aspergers, increased my bumblebee's concerta to 27 and sends us on our way. Since then we have had one more appointment with him where he was more focused on getting us hooked up with a 3 month by mail script and "we'll see you in April".
Enter yesterday. I got called back to the school to meet with the teacher and the principle. His grades are slipping, but only because he is distracted and not getting work done in time. His is complaining of headaches that always occur after being in the extremely loud cafeteria. He keeps avoiding group activities by literally just walking away and doing something else regardless of what is said to him. I told them about what the intake specialist said about aspergers. The principle lit right up and said she was so glad to hear that because that is what they think too. They want so very much to put an IEP plan in place for him and support him. He is so smart and has made an overall positive impression. These are good peeps.
I'm miserable. I feel like such a jerk. I missed so many signs it's not even funny. All his life he has always given what I call "hard hugs" he hugs so hard it's painful and won't stop until you make him. Always sighs so contentedly and almost glazes over with like a euphoria. His principle said it's compression, a sensory thing, and also his issues with crowd noise. They are already going to put some help in place. Like giving him a little balance cushion on his seat so he can wiggle at will and making a little island in the classroom for him to go to when he needs a break. They are going to scare up some earmuffs or headphones for assemblies and cafeteria if he needs them.
But they can't do an IEP without an "official" diagnosis. We are moving to CA in July, and this school wants to hook us up with as much information, plans and even an IQ test so that we can take them with us to his new school and start him off right. His appointment is this afternoon and I feel like I'm gearing up for battle and I don't know what armor and weapons to equip!
I'm sorry this is so long. I needed to vent and express and biotch....I feel like **** and I'm trying to get all tough for this and demand his medications be adjusted to cover his anxiety issues too and that we really spend some time getting this right. Ok...thanks. I'll quit now before I cry ... again. Sorry if I got all the abbreviations etc wrong. There are so many lol!
I came across your forum while searching for help on understanding ADHD and Aspergers. My 8 year old son has had quite the history of not being able to function well in a learning environment, even back to preschool and daycares before that. All his life I have had various people from these places, and family members, constantly telling me that "oh, he is adhd. Definitely. You should really do something about that. Soon." While giving me a look...
I was not convinced and so I tried finding other, more natural solutions, to help him behave better and understand consequences. These ranged from various vitamins to trying the elimination diet to trying every book out there on making kids behave with various versions of time-outs, reward systems galore, losing possessions, positive reinforcement. You name it, I likely tried it. by the way, his issues are strictly behavior, mainly social. His grades are perfect, he never requires any help beyond pushing him to actually finish it and turn in work. His standardized test scores have consistently been among the highest in his school.
Enter 2nd grade and at this point, I'm exhausted from our battles. In the first two weeks he nearly gets booted from the before/after school program and I am called to a meeting with his teacher. I'm done, fed up, can't take hearing it anymore. After an entire night crying about it, I took him to his pediatrician, laid it all out and begged for help. She ordered an ekg and a echo and blood tests and a couple weeks later, put him on Concerta (18). This was in October. He seemed to improve a bit, at least as far as impulsivity and aggressiveness goes. Calmed down quite a bit, but still extremely distractable. So it seemed.
His doctor did not want to manage his medications, not her specialty, so she referred us to a behavioral center to take over. It took seven weeks to get an initial appointment, and we had to meet twice with an intake specialist (an LPC). She filled out all the info from her questionaires and ordered additional bloodwork. In our second visit she pulled out a checklist and asked me to fill it out. It was for Aspergers.
Our third visit was with the psychiatrist to begin medication mgmt. While in the waiting room, the LPC came out to see us and pulled me aside. She told me he scored "off the charts" for Aspergers and went on to demonstrate some techniques with him to help me help him make eye contact, which he NEVER does, as well as to help me understand it. Suggested I learn more about it and informed the psychiatric of his score. 15 minutes later, my son is relatively calm in his office though thoroughly distracted by his "stuff" while he and I talk. He states he just "doesn't see it" for the aspergers, increased my bumblebee's concerta to 27 and sends us on our way. Since then we have had one more appointment with him where he was more focused on getting us hooked up with a 3 month by mail script and "we'll see you in April".
Enter yesterday. I got called back to the school to meet with the teacher and the principle. His grades are slipping, but only because he is distracted and not getting work done in time. His is complaining of headaches that always occur after being in the extremely loud cafeteria. He keeps avoiding group activities by literally just walking away and doing something else regardless of what is said to him. I told them about what the intake specialist said about aspergers. The principle lit right up and said she was so glad to hear that because that is what they think too. They want so very much to put an IEP plan in place for him and support him. He is so smart and has made an overall positive impression. These are good peeps.
I'm miserable. I feel like such a jerk. I missed so many signs it's not even funny. All his life he has always given what I call "hard hugs" he hugs so hard it's painful and won't stop until you make him. Always sighs so contentedly and almost glazes over with like a euphoria. His principle said it's compression, a sensory thing, and also his issues with crowd noise. They are already going to put some help in place. Like giving him a little balance cushion on his seat so he can wiggle at will and making a little island in the classroom for him to go to when he needs a break. They are going to scare up some earmuffs or headphones for assemblies and cafeteria if he needs them.
But they can't do an IEP without an "official" diagnosis. We are moving to CA in July, and this school wants to hook us up with as much information, plans and even an IQ test so that we can take them with us to his new school and start him off right. His appointment is this afternoon and I feel like I'm gearing up for battle and I don't know what armor and weapons to equip!
I'm sorry this is so long. I needed to vent and express and biotch....I feel like **** and I'm trying to get all tough for this and demand his medications be adjusted to cover his anxiety issues too and that we really spend some time getting this right. Ok...thanks. I'll quit now before I cry ... again. Sorry if I got all the abbreviations etc wrong. There are so many lol!