I am new to this site today. I have been dealing with my difficult child and her behaviour for 15 years...since she was 17. She started off running away, smoking pot, getting pregnant, keeping the child, getting married, fighting for a couple of years, then the verbal and emotional abuse of her child, a new relationship, continued abuse, another child, and now the final straw...crack cocaine and continued abuse of her kids. I have reported her to child welfare and they basically just give a slap on the wrist and do nothing. I have had 2 heart attacks since January of this year and am feeling so depressed. Went to the casino yesterday and blew my whole months money...am having a breakdown. Now, I know that many people would say, save yourself, get rid of her out of your life....however, I choose not to do that. For some reason I believe that you cannot help if you are not in contact and you cannot show support and concern if you are not in their life. And, sad to say, the pain I feel now would be compounded 100 times if I didn't know what was happening. Of course then there are the grandchildren, I adore them. The oldest one is ok emotionally for the most part, he has found a way to cope. The 8 year old though is having so much trouble..although she has been diagnosed with ADHD, I think she also has Oppositional Defiance Disorder. She is a mean little girl, smart, very smart..reading at 3 years ahead of her age...academically bored...emtionally stunted. No social skills...talks to you in factual short bursts, never discusses feelings, like she has none...always in trouble at school...highly defiant to all. Omigod, I guess I just need to vent, and have not found the place. Friends and family of course are fed up with any discussion of them. So now only talk with 1 other person who has a similar situation with the drugs addiction. I know I cannot change anything...has to come from her..but how do I cope and not throw away the relationship? Is that a pipe dream? What about the kids? Do I have any options....Lord I hope someone out there has some advice, even if it doesn't work, it will be something to try and I have to remain optimistic. I am sending this out to you here and to the Universe and hope for an aid to my life. Oh ya, forgot to say, she screams and yells at me most days, the days when she doesn't she is a wonderful daughter, but cannot master it for more than a day or so.