New

[DS3]

I'll have to get a doctor to refer. The insurance won't cover it otherwise.

If there have been any speech delays, "different" sounding speech patterns, issues such as very repetitive or halting speech, you will want to look into a speech-language assessment as well.

He was a preemie. He was late in doing everything. From crawling, to walking, to talking, you name it. He was on ECI (Early Childhood Intervention) until 3, but they couldn't recommend him to go anywhere after that because he exceeded the 'norm'. Meaning that he not only met the standards to not be qualified for ECI, but he exceeded them so much that they basically told me to wait until school. I couldn't find anyone to take him (besides paying for daycare), until he hit the age of 4. He starts Pre-K in a couple of weeks.

 

[DS3]

On a side note; Using TEC and the 'Plan B' method, I was trying to see why my son wouldn't pick up his toys. The conversation went something like this:

: I need you to pick up your toys (Plan A, I know -still trying to break that habit)
difficult child: No.
: Is there a reason why?
difficult child: I don't want to!!!
: I understand that you don't want to pick up your toys. What's up?
difficult child: Silent.
: Is it possible that you feel you can't find your toys if we put them away?
difficult child: Yeah.
: Do you think we could come up with a solution to this? Mommy can't have toys all over the floor when she's trying to clean.
difficult child: We need to buy a new house (LOL!)
: I don't think that's quite feasible. We need to wait until daddy comes home before we move. Perhaps we could try putting the toys in bins so that way you can find them better?
difficult child: Yeah.
: Will that work for you?
difficult child: Yeah.
: Good... It'll work for me too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like the fact that he was trying to participate (since he really hasn't yet in the solution part. I think he has a hard time coming up with ideas.), but the fact that he said we needed to buy a new house so he wouldn't have to pick up his toys is hilarious to me. Kids say the darnedest things.


Please also note, before you all point out my flaws in how I'm using this (I'm not saying not to), just understand that I'm quite new to it, and this is only day 4. Still bound to be some mistakes.

 

[nvts]

Personally, I sort of like the idea of the house gets messy so let's go buy a new one - I vote for his solution! He's adorable...he really is!

Beth

 

[TeDo]

DS3, it sounds like you did a great job (for a beginner). KUDOS to you both. Next time he can't come up with a possible solution, try throwing out an absurd one and see where he goes with it. I have done this with difficult child and it works most of the time especially if my idea is outrageous and means him losing his toys (dumptruck=landfill=no more toys). My idea is usually so outrageous and costly (to him) that he comes up with a better one. I can come up with some doozies. He laughs first then comes up with something workable.

You're off to a great start but I like the new house idea too (if someone ELSE is going to pay for it). LOL

 

[SRL]

I'll have to get a doctor to refer. The insurance won't cover it otherwise.

He was a preemie. He was late in doing everything. From crawling, to walking, to talking, you name it. He was on ECI (Early Childhood Intervention) until 3, but they couldn't recommend him to go anywhere after that because he exceeded the 'norm'. Meaning that he not only met the standards to not be qualified for ECI, but he exceeded them so much that they basically told me to wait until school. I couldn't find anyone to take him (besides paying for daycare), until he hit the age of 4. He starts Pre-K in a couple of weeks.

You have two things going on here that make getting to root issues more difficult. First, when kids have a medical condition (such as being a preemie) or major disruption in their life (such as frequent hospitalizations those first years) it's natural to chalk up whatever is going on to those factors and miss what's really behind those behaviors. Second, being on the fence is a hard place to be--having issues that need attention but not severe enough to qualify for services or be readily recognizable. This will make your job harder, but keep doing your homework and pressing for answers and needed outside help.

 

[DS3]

You have two things going on here that make getting to root issues more difficult. First, when kids have a medical condition (such as being a preemie) or major disruption in their life (such as frequent hospitalizations those first years) it's natural to chalk up whatever is going on to those factors and miss what's really behind those behaviors. Second, being on the fence is a hard place to be--having issues that need attention but not severe enough to qualify for services or be readily recognizable. This will make your job harder, but keep doing your homework and pressing for answers and needed outside help.

Well today is a big day. I have ACS (Army Community Services) coming out for a visit (for me and my depression -but they bring different ideas to me for help with my difficult child.) Then my difficult child goes to his play therapist where I have to explain 'Plan B' to her and everything that has gone on since last we saw her. Then I got an appointment with my difficult child's PCM (Primary Care Physician) so that way I can get a referral to the neuro-psychiatric. Since I don't believe him seeing the neurologist is a bad idea either, I went ahead and made him an appointment -but the soonest they could get him in was 8August2011.

So we'll see what happens with everything today. On a side note; my shampooer broke again today. I just got it fixed. So that's where my frustration is today.Just have to find the time to take it back to the repair shop and let them know what a horrible job they did in fixing it. At the very least, the kids are behaving for the most part.

 

[TeDo]

Sounds like you are on the right track. Way to go Warrior Mom!! Take the bull by the horns. You should give yourself a pat on the back. I hope PCP is willing to give you the referral. Enjoy the day (what is a problem with a piece of equipment when you LIVE with a difficult child!)

 

[DS3]

I met his doctor down here while visiting a NICU because he had RSV (nasty nasty thing). Anywho -He's pretty cool. Just can't call in and ask for a referall. Have to actually go in. I don't believe it will be a problem.

And thanks for the encouragement. Not only am I doing all of this on my own (since the hubby is away), but I have to take care of the house, the bills, and I'm in my last class for my BS degree (and holding a 3.7 avg) on top of everything else going on. You guys have no idea how grateful I am for all of your support and the fact that I actually found someplace where people understand. And to give me such a great resource as TEC, it's truly wonderful being here. So thank you.

 

[DS3]

Ok, so the meeting with ACS went well. No real news there. difficult child's therapy appointment went really well. She suggested the neuropsychologist as well. Best part of all, she owns TEC, and totally understood what I was trying to do. She even suggested another book titled 'Over-Indulged Children: A Parent's Guide to Mentoring' by Dr. James A Fogarty. I don't know if anyone else has ever read it, but I'm going to give it a shot and see what it says. The therapist also took a copy of the paperwork I had printed out and done on sensory dysfunction. She seemed pleased that I had done my research and was seeking answers. So the only thing left is the referral today, which that appointment is in a couple of hours.

 

[TeDo]

Awesome!! It sounds like you have professionals that are on the same page as you! How terrific for you and difficult child. I am so pleased things are starting to work out for you. I am sooooo jealous.

 

[DS3]

Don't be so jealous just yet. I need help. My difficult child's PCM said he doesn't mind giving me a referral to a neuropsychologist. However, I need to find one. There is not one in the entire El Paso, TX area. I did a search online through my insurance, and up to 250 miles away, there is no one.

 

[keista]

Call your insurance company and ask them. The website provider lists aren't always updated regularly.

 

[TeDo]

Sending you a PM with a link.

 

[DS3]

I may have found one about an hours drive away. I'm going to have to call them in the morning and make sure they take children and can do the evaluation. Otherwise I did find some in Albuquerque (about a 4 hour drive). Wish me luck.

 

[TeDo]

LUCK! LUCK! LUCK! Pretzeling & praying too.

 

[DS3]

Is it normal to have to 'leave a message' for the neuro-psychiatric doctors office to call you back? I mean, I'm just looking into the couple of places that I found, but thought it weird that during their normal business hours, I had to leave a message.

 

[Ktllc]

I've had to do that with a couple different doctor (developmental pediatrician and psychiatrics office). They usually call back within 24hours. I thought it was a little odd as well... I guess they are swamped. Just leave your message and you will hear from them.

 

[DS3]

I've had to do that with a couple different doctor (developmental pediatrician and psychiatrics office). They usually call back within 24hours. I thought it was a little odd as well... I guess they are swamped. Just leave your message and you will hear from them.

And you're right. They did call back. Soonest opening was mid-october. But they're going to put him at the top of the waiting list. So hopefully we can get there sooner. Better news is that they said they can do the total evaluation all in one day. So unless they find something 'horribly' wrong, then we shouldn't have to go back. Is this normal?

 

[InsaneCdn]

But they're going to put him at the top of the waiting list. So hopefully we can get there sooner.

If "waiting list" there = "short notice call list" here, then the waiting list is used to fill short-notice cancellations... which means, if you're desperate, you're willing to throw your schedule in chaos just to get there... and of course, you're desperate. So everybody wins... you get in sooner, and someone else gets what would have been your spot.

Better news is that they said they can do the total evaluation all in one day. So unless they find something 'horribly' wrong, then we shouldn't have to go back. Is this normal?

I know its usually a day's worth of evaluation... some places spit that into 2 or 3 pieces, rather than doing it all on the same day - but yes, normally, a day's worth of testing would cover the bases.

 

[HaoZi]

That was a quick call back! The one here that was recommended to me, when I called their office the person who answered refused to even tell me if they accept Kiddo's insurance because we didn't have a doctor's referral. Called again when the insurance company pre-approved us for testing and referred us to them, and they still wouldn't see us.
Hoping your trip through this testing is as smooth as possible for y'all.