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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 675530" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I do not want to scare you. But I don't want you to delude yourself either.</p><p></p><p>It went wrong in college, where there is no supervision or rules. It is not uncommon to start there, especially if a child goes away to college. These people are good at pretending they use less than they do. We had no clue about my daughter.</p><p></p><p>We thought my daughter was just using pot, even though we saw signs that it was more. We didn't want to think so. And we never dreamed s he was selling anything. But after she quit, she spilled all, as if it were inside of her and she wanted to confess. And you could have knocked me over with a feather. I was so shocked.</p><p></p><p>Not only was there pot at age twelve, but there were ADHD drugs which she crushed in a pillcrusher and snorted either alone or with cocaine. Adderrall is worth a lot on the street, in particular. I had never heard of this, being naive as I was. She used meth. Yes, meth. Psychodelics. And we did not know although she was living at home. She did it mostly at night when we were sleeping and snuck out to be with her "friends." She tried heroin a few times, which shocked me the most, because I had thought that if you used it even one time, you were going to be hooked. She said not true...that was only if you used a needle and that was one thing she never did. She was way more involved with hard drugs than we guessed and your son very well may also be. There is really no reason to sell pot...it is readily available now.</p><p></p><p>I believe that if you know your child is doing drugs, you need to accept that you don't know what they are really doing. Drug addicts lie (my daughter's words again). There is little you can do about it, but there are a few things you can do. Hide your valuables and lock them up before they are stolen and pawned. Don't hand out any money...it will be used for drugs, not for food, as they try to say to pull on our kind mother hearts. Do spend time on yourself and your well loved ones and don't let this child suck all the oxygen out of your w orld because he isn't going to change one bit UNLESS HE WANTS TO. You can't control him, just yourself and your reaction to him.</p><p></p><p>Do go to a place for support, such as the wonderful Al-Anon or a private psychologist to help you through this. Don't go thinking you will find a way to c ure your son. You can't. But you can cure yourself from being sucked into his world and you deserve a good life, even if he is self-destructing. That's what many of us have learned to do. In my case and in the case of many, things either ceased or got better with time, but NOT BECAUSE OF ANYTHING WE DID. It has to come from them.</p><p></p><p>I hope you can focus on your loved ones who are not ill and have a wonderful Christmas. I know it is hard. I've been there. But you won't help anyone if you get physically or mentally sick and others need you and you need to be g ood to yourself.</p><p></p><p>"God grant me the serenity to accept the things we can not change,</p><p>the courage to change the things we can,</p><p>and t he Wisdom to know the difference."</p><p></p><p>If you do not believe in God, then just take God out of it. These are very wise words.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 675530, member: 1550"] I do not want to scare you. But I don't want you to delude yourself either. It went wrong in college, where there is no supervision or rules. It is not uncommon to start there, especially if a child goes away to college. These people are good at pretending they use less than they do. We had no clue about my daughter. We thought my daughter was just using pot, even though we saw signs that it was more. We didn't want to think so. And we never dreamed s he was selling anything. But after she quit, she spilled all, as if it were inside of her and she wanted to confess. And you could have knocked me over with a feather. I was so shocked. Not only was there pot at age twelve, but there were ADHD drugs which she crushed in a pillcrusher and snorted either alone or with cocaine. Adderrall is worth a lot on the street, in particular. I had never heard of this, being naive as I was. She used meth. Yes, meth. Psychodelics. And we did not know although she was living at home. She did it mostly at night when we were sleeping and snuck out to be with her "friends." She tried heroin a few times, which shocked me the most, because I had thought that if you used it even one time, you were going to be hooked. She said not true...that was only if you used a needle and that was one thing she never did. She was way more involved with hard drugs than we guessed and your son very well may also be. There is really no reason to sell pot...it is readily available now. I believe that if you know your child is doing drugs, you need to accept that you don't know what they are really doing. Drug addicts lie (my daughter's words again). There is little you can do about it, but there are a few things you can do. Hide your valuables and lock them up before they are stolen and pawned. Don't hand out any money...it will be used for drugs, not for food, as they try to say to pull on our kind mother hearts. Do spend time on yourself and your well loved ones and don't let this child suck all the oxygen out of your w orld because he isn't going to change one bit UNLESS HE WANTS TO. You can't control him, just yourself and your reaction to him. Do go to a place for support, such as the wonderful Al-Anon or a private psychologist to help you through this. Don't go thinking you will find a way to c ure your son. You can't. But you can cure yourself from being sucked into his world and you deserve a good life, even if he is self-destructing. That's what many of us have learned to do. In my case and in the case of many, things either ceased or got better with time, but NOT BECAUSE OF ANYTHING WE DID. It has to come from them. I hope you can focus on your loved ones who are not ill and have a wonderful Christmas. I know it is hard. I've been there. But you won't help anyone if you get physically or mentally sick and others need you and you need to be g ood to yourself. "God grant me the serenity to accept the things we can not change, the courage to change the things we can, and t he Wisdom to know the difference." If you do not believe in God, then just take God out of it. These are very wise words. [/QUOTE]
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