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Parent Emeritus
Newbie here - long, rambling post
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 642460" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p><img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" />Hi MTDenise, welcome to the group.</p><p></p><p>I am so glad you found this as there really is years of life experience here on these pages. I so wish I could have found something like this years ago. My difficult child will be 34 next month. My husband and I have been dealing with his poor life choices for 20 years. It truly is gut wrenching when you find out your own child is stealing from you and lying. I got to the point with my difficult child that if his lips were moving, he was lying.</p><p></p><p>You sound like you have a really good grip on what you need to do in that you are detaching and focusing on yourself. I can tell you that difficult child's can be very cunning in how they try to manipulate to get what they want so just be on guard for that. Mine has used the threat of suicide before in hopes that I would cave in and give him money.</p><p></p><p></p><p> Love this response!!</p><p></p><p>Yes, that is the most awkward question to be asked. There is some great advice here of things you could say. Ultimately you need to be comfortable with what ever your response will be. For me, it depends on whom I'm talking to as to how I will respond. People that are close to me know the truth. When I meet someone new and they ask if I have any children I say yes, I have one son and three grandchildren and I go into how much I adore my grandchildren. I have been asked where does your son and daughter in-law live to which I respond they are divorced and my daughter in-law and grandchildren live in XXXX. I have never had anyone get too nosy but if that ever happens I will have no problem telling them it's something I do not care to discuss with them.</p><p></p><p>Again, welcome. I'm glad you found us but sorry you had to.</p><p></p><p>Hugs to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 642460, member: 18516"] :)Hi MTDenise, welcome to the group. I am so glad you found this as there really is years of life experience here on these pages. I so wish I could have found something like this years ago. My difficult child will be 34 next month. My husband and I have been dealing with his poor life choices for 20 years. It truly is gut wrenching when you find out your own child is stealing from you and lying. I got to the point with my difficult child that if his lips were moving, he was lying. You sound like you have a really good grip on what you need to do in that you are detaching and focusing on yourself. I can tell you that difficult child's can be very cunning in how they try to manipulate to get what they want so just be on guard for that. Mine has used the threat of suicide before in hopes that I would cave in and give him money. Love this response!! Yes, that is the most awkward question to be asked. There is some great advice here of things you could say. Ultimately you need to be comfortable with what ever your response will be. For me, it depends on whom I'm talking to as to how I will respond. People that are close to me know the truth. When I meet someone new and they ask if I have any children I say yes, I have one son and three grandchildren and I go into how much I adore my grandchildren. I have been asked where does your son and daughter in-law live to which I respond they are divorced and my daughter in-law and grandchildren live in XXXX. I have never had anyone get too nosy but if that ever happens I will have no problem telling them it's something I do not care to discuss with them. Again, welcome. I'm glad you found us but sorry you had to. Hugs to you. [/QUOTE]
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