newbie! quick hello...

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by pigpen777, May 5, 2009.

  1. pigpen777

    pigpen777 New Member

    i say quick because it's almost midnight and i'm fading fast!:laughing:
    i am sooo very happy to have found this board. i am sure i'll be a frequent visitor. my 11 yr old was just diagnosed ADHD/ODD and we are going to be starting on Focalin (sp?) this week. i am glad to finally have a diagnosis of sorts but am saddened to think of my baby having such rough life. of course, ask me how sad i am when he is being defiant :clubbing:

    i am trying to find out all i can in order to help him with this. i also fear it getting worse as the teenage years set in. i have 2 lo's and the constant arguing takes its toll on them, too.

    anyhoo, hello to you all! i am sure i will have neverending questions when i am not quite so tired.:bloodshot:
  2. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Welcome! Yours is a common diagnosis around here so lots of understanding and support.

    Looking forward to getting to know you and your difficult child. Go ahead and share good things also. Sometimes we are so frustrated with the challenging behaviors we have to be reminded of and focus on the special things that make our children wonderful.

    We do know that your child is an awesome person and has great qualities even though they are hard to see some days.
  3. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Hi Pigpen, welcome!

    Glad you found us.
    You will find LOTS of similar stories.
    My son is 12 and is still snotty but not violently defiant like he used to be. One thing that has helped is to have my husband on board. He is learning to jump in ea and every time my son says something to me. For ex, last night, he asked to be excused from the dinner table 4X. We finally excused him, with-the caveat that he scrub the pans in the sink. He said something snotty and my husband told him that was disrepectful. difficult child yelled, "FINE! I'll DO it!" or something, and then I countered that he was being disrepectful to husband. We cannot let one thing go. He needs to be made aware of it. Otherwise, it's as natural to him as breathing.
    Also, I have relaxed the rules so that when only my difficult child and I are home for dinner, I allow him to eat in the LR in front of the TV. That used to be a major source of fights. Now we just focus on having him eat with-the entire family when we are here, and also on his presence, appearance and manners when we eat out.
    Choose your battles.
  5. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    P.S. I LOVE your avatar!
  6. daralex

    daralex Clinging onto my sanity

    Welcome aboard - if it weren't for this board I would have lost my mind! I hope you find what you need here.

  7. lizanne2

    lizanne2 New Member

    Yes, welcome. I also would have been just stuck without this board.