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Newbie-seeking advice and help
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 630749" data-attributes="member: 4152"><p>I have thought to myself that this thing we have to do ... Separate and detach from our dysfunctional adult children might very well be one of the hardest things , yet it needs to be done. I found a book called "Boundaries" by Cloud and Townsend helpful. Setting up boundaries is the beginning. You would very likely find it helpful to go to a Parents Anonymous or Al Anon meeting. Getting support from others will be comforting. Short term therapy for yourself or as a couple might be needed. But you have to make this decision to move forward. You are actually not truly helping him one bit by enabling him and are likely causing harm to yourself or even your marriage. This is too stressful for anyone. This is not your fault and there is nothing you can do to fix it. Life moves on and you need to move with it. My health has been rotten lately and I strongly suspect difficult child stress played a role in that. Don't let this happen to you. One day I said to my Higher Power....I release this to you...and I did feel better.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 630749, member: 4152"] I have thought to myself that this thing we have to do ... Separate and detach from our dysfunctional adult children might very well be one of the hardest things , yet it needs to be done. I found a book called "Boundaries" by Cloud and Townsend helpful. Setting up boundaries is the beginning. You would very likely find it helpful to go to a Parents Anonymous or Al Anon meeting. Getting support from others will be comforting. Short term therapy for yourself or as a couple might be needed. But you have to make this decision to move forward. You are actually not truly helping him one bit by enabling him and are likely causing harm to yourself or even your marriage. This is too stressful for anyone. This is not your fault and there is nothing you can do to fix it. Life moves on and you need to move with it. My health has been rotten lately and I strongly suspect difficult child stress played a role in that. Don't let this happen to you. One day I said to my Higher Power....I release this to you...and I did feel better. [/QUOTE]
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