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<blockquote data-quote="Sister's Keeper" data-source="post: 680361" data-attributes="member: 20051"><p>Maybe I can help with the grandkids issue. I am raising my nephews and niece because my sister is an addict and, very often, in jail. Soon she will be sentenced to 5 years, of which she estimates she will do 18 months.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, I don;t know your son's particular situation, but my sister is an addict. She has had no contact with her kids in nearly 4 years (they are 9, 7, and 4) so maybe it is a little different.</p><p></p><p>I tell them (the boys, the 4 year old is too little to understand and has some delays due to her mothers drug use while pregnant) that she is sick. That she uses drugs and that the drugs make it so that she can't think right and and that she makes bad choices that get her in trouble so she has to go to jail. I explain to them that jail isn't a nice place, but she is safe. My sister's main issue is that she is a thief. (she is also a prostitute, but the boys don't need to know that) I am honest with them to the point that they can understand. I tell them that she steals things so she can trade them for drugs. They know that stealing is wrong, and that people go to jail for stealing.</p><p></p><p>I don't let them visit her in jail, but she really has no relationship with them, so through glass would probably not be the correct way to forge one. We are at the point now where we are moving forward to terminate her parental rights.</p><p></p><p>Your grandkids have a relationship with their dad, so you are in a little different of a situation. Are they in any type of counseling?</p><p></p><p>I am well versed at jail, so maybe I can give you a little insight. Remembering that things vary from county to county. There really isn't much offered in the county in terms of treatment or even support groups. The majority of inmates are in for the short haul, and all inmates are in for under a year. Mostly they sleep, watch TV, read, or play cards all day. Some have jobs where they earn commissary money. Any stay he has in the county jail pre trial/sentencing will count towards his time served.</p><p></p><p>I don't accept calls from jail, because where my sister is they have to call collect, and you were very smart, be very wary of the conference call thing. Don't get caught up in any "deals" they are making. My sister told me a story about an inmate that she was in with who had a grounds job. She would get her mother to conference call the boyfriend who couldn't accept collect calls and they would use some sort of code and the boyfriend would drop cigarettes and pills at a spot she could pick them up when he visited.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sister's Keeper, post: 680361, member: 20051"] Maybe I can help with the grandkids issue. I am raising my nephews and niece because my sister is an addict and, very often, in jail. Soon she will be sentenced to 5 years, of which she estimates she will do 18 months. Anyway, I don;t know your son's particular situation, but my sister is an addict. She has had no contact with her kids in nearly 4 years (they are 9, 7, and 4) so maybe it is a little different. I tell them (the boys, the 4 year old is too little to understand and has some delays due to her mothers drug use while pregnant) that she is sick. That she uses drugs and that the drugs make it so that she can't think right and and that she makes bad choices that get her in trouble so she has to go to jail. I explain to them that jail isn't a nice place, but she is safe. My sister's main issue is that she is a thief. (she is also a prostitute, but the boys don't need to know that) I am honest with them to the point that they can understand. I tell them that she steals things so she can trade them for drugs. They know that stealing is wrong, and that people go to jail for stealing. I don't let them visit her in jail, but she really has no relationship with them, so through glass would probably not be the correct way to forge one. We are at the point now where we are moving forward to terminate her parental rights. Your grandkids have a relationship with their dad, so you are in a little different of a situation. Are they in any type of counseling? I am well versed at jail, so maybe I can give you a little insight. Remembering that things vary from county to county. There really isn't much offered in the county in terms of treatment or even support groups. The majority of inmates are in for the short haul, and all inmates are in for under a year. Mostly they sleep, watch TV, read, or play cards all day. Some have jobs where they earn commissary money. Any stay he has in the county jail pre trial/sentencing will count towards his time served. I don't accept calls from jail, because where my sister is they have to call collect, and you were very smart, be very wary of the conference call thing. Don't get caught up in any "deals" they are making. My sister told me a story about an inmate that she was in with who had a grounds job. She would get her mother to conference call the boyfriend who couldn't accept collect calls and they would use some sort of code and the boyfriend would drop cigarettes and pills at a spot she could pick them up when he visited. [/QUOTE]
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