NOLA
New Member
Its been an entire week and not a phone call, text message or email what is wrong with this kid? :grrr:The only reason I know hes alive is by viewing myspace not so much his page but others. I dont mean to sound like its all about me and how dare he dis me like that its just the horrid realization that he himself has it in him to be so cold and cruel to his parents. I rationalize by thinking maybe its the drugs, maybe its the fact that he stole the money and hes too embarrassed to call, maybe its just so exciting to be on-the-run, or maybe hes just a monster.
I sleep about 4 hours a night, go to work like a zombie and am always on the verge of loosing it. husband is in his own world and we are zero comfort to each other. My daughter hasnt said one word to me about the fact that her brother has run away. husband says its because she just doesnt know what to say and doesnt want t upset me. Its difficult to talk about with others because they either think how did you let it get THAT out of control or how can you sleep at night not knowing where your 16-year old is or how would they know who he is since he doesnt have an ID referring to the possibility of being found on the sidewalk passed out or worse. (the latter 2 were said to me yesterday)
To add to the potpourri of events this week, my older sister who is schizophrenic and in overall poor physical health is off her medications and calling me she is 12 years older so we have never been close but I struggle with a tremendous amount of guilt. I can hardly deal with her when things are fine on my end, right now it is impossible.
I am completely on board with the tough-love approach & finally understand the only way difficult child will change has to come from within but this is excruciating. How long am I supposed to wait? On the one hand, as long as I know he is okay a/k/a alive (via myspace, etc.) with his responsible young adults capable of living on their own, as am I thats a quote from his nice 2-page letter he left, I am refusing to track him down like in the past. But as usual there is the other hand, the one that says are you crazy? Hes 16 years old Which hand is best?
I sleep about 4 hours a night, go to work like a zombie and am always on the verge of loosing it. husband is in his own world and we are zero comfort to each other. My daughter hasnt said one word to me about the fact that her brother has run away. husband says its because she just doesnt know what to say and doesnt want t upset me. Its difficult to talk about with others because they either think how did you let it get THAT out of control or how can you sleep at night not knowing where your 16-year old is or how would they know who he is since he doesnt have an ID referring to the possibility of being found on the sidewalk passed out or worse. (the latter 2 were said to me yesterday)
To add to the potpourri of events this week, my older sister who is schizophrenic and in overall poor physical health is off her medications and calling me she is 12 years older so we have never been close but I struggle with a tremendous amount of guilt. I can hardly deal with her when things are fine on my end, right now it is impossible.
I am completely on board with the tough-love approach & finally understand the only way difficult child will change has to come from within but this is excruciating. How long am I supposed to wait? On the one hand, as long as I know he is okay a/k/a alive (via myspace, etc.) with his responsible young adults capable of living on their own, as am I thats a quote from his nice 2-page letter he left, I am refusing to track him down like in the past. But as usual there is the other hand, the one that says are you crazy? Hes 16 years old Which hand is best?