Not Sleeping

[hipperq]

daughter 2 is having an awful time sleeping. She usually can settle with a video. We often put her on the living room couch, because she's ODD and will sneak around doing things she shouldn't if we havent' got an eye on her. This afternoon she napped. Big mistake (despite her being exhausted). Now she can't settle. We've taken the power cord from the computers, hidden things she's not supposed to get into. But she also has ADHD and just can't settle long enough to rest. we let her read, play with toys, play with clay in the room if she's relatively calm and quiet.

Daughter 3 is constantly not wanting to get left out, but desperately needs more sleep. We've moved her into our room, so her sister doesn't keep her up all night.

I'm sick, my husband works nights. I'm going to just have to go to bed and let her stay up. I keep telling myself, at least she's safe. She's not angry, so she's not likely to do anything truly harmful, and if she ends up sneaking into the playroom at midnight or whatever, it's truly not the end of the world.

But it's so stressful when I can't figure out how to help my daughter get what she needs. And totally sucks with an ODD kid to have to let them get away with something they are not supposed to do, just because I'm desperate for sleep.

But as long as she (and we) are all safe.... I don't have to be Perfect Mom, just adequate mom.

Where's the Xanex?

 

[crazymama30]

If she is occupied, not upsetting the household, and safe? THen I would not worry. Have you ever tried giving her melatonin or even a sleepy time tea? Some people swear by this stuff, but I would check with your doctor first to be sure that it is ok.

 

[InsaneCdn]

ADHD, Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, ODD, anxiety

Did somebody actually diagnosis those in one fell swoop? or is that an accumulation of dxes?

Because...
Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified is just atypical Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD).
And... everything else you describe - including sleep issues - CAN be part of Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD).
Can also be part of other things that can be co-morbid with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)...
Either way, in my opinion, you can ditch the ODD diagnosis.
You need to figure out how she thinks, why she thinks that way, and the appraoches that actually work (Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)/Aspie/Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified kids need to be parented very differently from "typical" kids... but one Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)/Aspie/Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified kid can be extremely different from another Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)/Aspie/Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified kid...)

Sleep issue is something that I'd first treat as a medical issue.
Ever had a sleep study done?
Rule out every possible medical cause for sleep issues.
And then... look at the combo of sleep issues and Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified/Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)/Aspie... they may well be related.

 

[DammitJanet]

Sleep issues are horrible to deal with. Its one thirty in the morning and I cant get to sleep despite the fact that I am on enough medication to knock out half the east coast.

You may want to ask your doctor about melatonin if you havent ever tried it. Or even ask him if he thinks trying her on something to help her sleep would be in order. There are fairly safe medications out there that would probably help her get into a good sleep habit. Even benedryl if it works that way for her.

I do know that if she doesnt get enough sleep life is extremely hard for a kid. Being tired bites.

 

[BusynMember]

Nodding in agreement with Insane Canadian.

 

[dstc_99]

Honestly it sounds like you are doing the exact opposite of what is needed to get her to sleep. My easy child has extreme trouble sleeping and so do I. While medication such as melatonin and or prescriptions can be helpful even the best of us can stay up after taking them if we are stimulated. TV, light, talking, movement, and all kinds of things can cause a child to stay awake. I would spend some time trying to remove stimulants before I jumped off the end and went to a doctor for a diagnosis. It could really be a medical thing and if so then treatment is needed but sometimes it is simply overstimulation from the surroundings.

Try turning off the TV, turning off the lights, playing white noise or even "spa music", cutting off all caffiene after noon, possibly melatonin, and removing all stimulants. One hint with white noise or music is that you want to find something that doesn't have running water or things like birds chirping. Those type of things stimulate you to urinate or to listen for the next time the bird chirps. Things with a melody that can be hummed along to or sung don't help either. What I have found is an album called "Liquid Mind VIII: Sleep" that is available through Pandora or in my case I bought it and put it on itunes. My husband and I find it extremely low key but it kills all the noise around us enough to shut our minds off. We truly sleep better with it on.

Would it be possible to put daughter 2 in your room until she is asleep and then move her to her room? You could create a non stimulous area (IE no toys and cute things on the walls) and try it for a bit. Heck you could even lay down with her yourself so that you could see the things that stimulate her and remove them as needed. If it works then you could implement it in her room. It wont hurt daughter 3 and could even help her to sleep better.

Just my 2 cents. Of course if that doesn't work at the very least you can tell the therapist, psychiatrist, or whomever that you have tried all the things suggested and they don't work. I wasted a lot of time not trying the basics with my easy child but found they work relatively well.

 

[TerryJ2]

I'd use melatonin, and also, make sure she wakes up at the same time each day, no matter how little sleep she has gotten.
I would also make a dr appointment and make it the main topic of discussion.

Sorry, you can't use Xanax on an 8-yr-old. Sounds good, though! I bet the dr prescribes an antihistamine, like Vistaril.

I understand the idea of letting her play all night, as long as she's safe. Maybe on a Fri night you could do that. But she's going to get out of any routine she's been on if you do that. Also, I agree, that the lights and noises may be keeping her awake. How about one soft light, and a book?