Not so tough.....

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by toughlovin, May 23, 2013.

  1. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    Ugh... it has been a tough day. Last night I had a very tough convo with difficult child over FB. He sounded very suicidal and really scared me. He feels he is out of options.... and I think the thing with the ex girlfriend has ended...Of course he was also drinking and off his medications which doesnt help at all. But he really sounded like he might end it all... he stopped responding about 1am and I finally went to bed and actually somehow got some sleep!!

    Today I have been very upset not knowing what happened and not having an address for where he is I cant even call the police to check on him!! It has just been haunting me. And I keep thinking what a way to ruin his sisters graduation!!

    And yes I am fully aware it could all be manipulation and it is probably working because my resolve was definitely weakened!!

    So today he finally got on line and we had another convo much to my relief!!! I am just relieved he is stilll alive!!!

    He made a comment that "you would not consider paying for a sober house back here". My husband and I have been talking and I have b een thinking maybe the best thing is for him to come back to the area where we are and where we can see and love him. No way will he live with us though, we would rather pay for him to live in sober living, even bad sober living, than to live here. So I said I might consider it but he would need to deal with his legal issues and get serious therapy.... dealing with his legal issues would mean doing some time. I called the lawyer and he is going to check on things to get an idea of much time we would be talking about.

    I think my difficult child is mulling it over.... still thinking he can come back and just avoid the police. I told him we could not help him financially if he does not deal with his legal issues because that would put us in a bad position. I am not sure we would get in trouble for helping him avoid the law or not... but it goes against all of our principals.

    So I am better than I was this morning.... but still totally on edge (and so eating too much which is my addiction).

  2. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    I hope he takes you up on your offer!! Could you also make it part of the deal that he gets some counseling or therapy if you pay for sober living? My difficult child sounds like she is breaking, too, so I am trying to support her and encourage her on that right path...