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<blockquote data-quote="JKF" data-source="post: 625967" data-attributes="member: 12470"><p>For someone who made it so clear that he wants nothing to do with his family, difficult child sure has been calling and texting a lot. He called me twice last night at 11:45 pm my time but I didn't hear the calls because I was sleeping and I turn my ringer off at night. Then just now he sent me 10 texts telling me how much he hates his grandfather and wants nothing to do with him. Apparently my dad text him saying he was glad he's gone because he's evil. I think that hurt difficult child's feelings but as I told him his grandfather is certainly entitled to his feelings at this point. I told him that I can't control how his grandfather feels just like I can't control what difficult child does. </p><p></p><p>I responded to the texts but I played very neutral. I didn't let difficult child engage me in drama or pull me into his situation. He tried with the usual "I'm just like my father, I'm no good, I'm a f'up and waste of human life"...the whole spiel. I simply told him that I was sorry he was feeling like that and that he needs to figure out his next step. If that involves calling the SW for help with shelter he should think about doing that. </p><p></p><p>Usually at this point in the game the guilt sets in. I admit, I feel a little pang here and there but nothing like in the past. Obviously we hurt when our children hurt but I realize now that difficult child deliberately hurts himself repeatedly and I can't let him keep hurting me along with himself. Of course I still have some bad habits - checking Facebook (he blocked me but I can still see his page through easy child's page) and I also have a habit of checking the weather to see what elements he might be braving. It was 70 degrees there today but it's supposed to drop to 28 tonight. Brrr- that's cold. *Sigh* At this point last year I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to difficult child's issues but tonight, instead of worrying, I have some volunteer work to do with the Boy Scouts and then I'm coming home to watch The Real Housewives of NYC (total guilty pleasure but it's mindless TV and I admit, I like it!) Tomorrow I am getting my first massage ever. I'm a little nervous but I think it's just what the Dr. ordered. So yeah - I'm living <em>my</em> life in spite of difficult child's latest drama and bout with homelessness. I never would have thought it possible a year ago but here I am nonetheless.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JKF, post: 625967, member: 12470"] For someone who made it so clear that he wants nothing to do with his family, difficult child sure has been calling and texting a lot. He called me twice last night at 11:45 pm my time but I didn't hear the calls because I was sleeping and I turn my ringer off at night. Then just now he sent me 10 texts telling me how much he hates his grandfather and wants nothing to do with him. Apparently my dad text him saying he was glad he's gone because he's evil. I think that hurt difficult child's feelings but as I told him his grandfather is certainly entitled to his feelings at this point. I told him that I can't control how his grandfather feels just like I can't control what difficult child does. I responded to the texts but I played very neutral. I didn't let difficult child engage me in drama or pull me into his situation. He tried with the usual "I'm just like my father, I'm no good, I'm a f'up and waste of human life"...the whole spiel. I simply told him that I was sorry he was feeling like that and that he needs to figure out his next step. If that involves calling the SW for help with shelter he should think about doing that. Usually at this point in the game the guilt sets in. I admit, I feel a little pang here and there but nothing like in the past. Obviously we hurt when our children hurt but I realize now that difficult child deliberately hurts himself repeatedly and I can't let him keep hurting me along with himself. Of course I still have some bad habits - checking Facebook (he blocked me but I can still see his page through easy child's page) and I also have a habit of checking the weather to see what elements he might be braving. It was 70 degrees there today but it's supposed to drop to 28 tonight. Brrr- that's cold. *Sigh* At this point last year I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to difficult child's issues but tonight, instead of worrying, I have some volunteer work to do with the Boy Scouts and then I'm coming home to watch The Real Housewives of NYC (total guilty pleasure but it's mindless TV and I admit, I like it!) Tomorrow I am getting my first massage ever. I'm a little nervous but I think it's just what the Dr. ordered. So yeah - I'm living [I]my[/I] life in spite of difficult child's latest drama and bout with homelessness. I never would have thought it possible a year ago but here I am nonetheless. [/QUOTE]
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