welcometowitsend
Member
So difficult child is up to his usual antics.
He is back living with girlfriend - at least for now. I'm not sure where that is going.
When we went to the counsellor on Wednesday he told her that he was allowed to stay at girlfriend's for a week and then was planning on finding another friend to move in with. So I think - ok, let the couch surfing begin.
Then when the counsellor says "do you think you crossed a line when you called your mother an f'n b?" He says, "No, not really." Whaaaatttttt!!! Now, he may have been saying this just to tick me off but you should have seen the counsellor's face! The usual impartial face looked a little shocked!
Anyway, he also informed us all that he often sleeps in the same bed with girlfriend at her place. And he wonders why I won't let him stay there? Duh! Oh no Mom, this is perfectly normal teenage behaviour and all my friends are allowed to sleep over at their boyfriends/girlfriends house. Yeah, ok.
I'm not sure how he is going to like this counsellor. He was pretty disengaged through the entire session - after she told him that a home was not a democracy (I love that!!) he seemed to kind of glaze over unless he was given an opportunity to make me look bad and then he was all over it. He goes to see her alone next week so we will see how that goes. I may go by myself next week too - I think I need it.
So, anyway, he skipped classes two or three more times this week. The school calls each time and I report him truant - not that they seem to be doing anything about it. Next time he skips I will call the vice principal again. Grrrr.
Fast forward to today.... I call girlfriend's house and get her dad. (I knew they weren't home - it's Friday night after all) Anyway, I say I have something sensitive I'd like to discuss with him and that the reason I am calling is because if girlfriend was my daughter then I would want to know. I tell him I'm very sure they are sexually active and that difficult child told us that he sleeps in her bed with her. girlfriend's father was kind of surprised by this - really? So, anyway, I discussed my concerns with him - their young age, neither has a job, neither is finished high school, blah blah blah.
We then move on to other topics. girlfriend's dad is discovering he isn't very ambitious. No kidding! He has been asked to cut the grass, clean up, do dishes - he doesn't do anything unless girlfriend badgers him into doing the dishes once in a while. Apparently girlfriend has to be on his case all the time to get anything done. he's probably getting worse nagging from her than he got from us - but I guess the sex wins out.
I also asked girlfriend's dad how long he was intending to let difficult child stay. He doesn't know. He'll have to talk to girlfriend and find out what is going on. So girlfriend is running the house? Or is girlfriend's mom running things and just not telling dad because they are getting divorced and I don't think they communicate with each other at all. It was just weird that my kid is living in his house and he has no idea if the kid is allowed to stay, has to go or what - he has to ask his daughter?
I get a phone call from difficult child at 11:15pm tonight asking me why I told girlfriend's dad that I would sue him if difficult child got his daughter pregnant. What? I never said that. So, I told him that I had concerns about him sleeping with girlfriend and thought that her father should know what was happening. I said maybe he is worried we will sue him but I didn't say that I would. It was an odd phone call.
Why wouldn't girlfriend's father just say - gig's up. You're not sleeping with my daughter in my home. I"m not ok with that. Is he that afraid to make his kid angry with him that he feels the need to blame it on me? Sorry dear, you can't sleep with difficult child because his parents might sue me if you get pregnant? It was just weird.
He is back living with girlfriend - at least for now. I'm not sure where that is going.
When we went to the counsellor on Wednesday he told her that he was allowed to stay at girlfriend's for a week and then was planning on finding another friend to move in with. So I think - ok, let the couch surfing begin.
Then when the counsellor says "do you think you crossed a line when you called your mother an f'n b?" He says, "No, not really." Whaaaatttttt!!! Now, he may have been saying this just to tick me off but you should have seen the counsellor's face! The usual impartial face looked a little shocked!
Anyway, he also informed us all that he often sleeps in the same bed with girlfriend at her place. And he wonders why I won't let him stay there? Duh! Oh no Mom, this is perfectly normal teenage behaviour and all my friends are allowed to sleep over at their boyfriends/girlfriends house. Yeah, ok.
I'm not sure how he is going to like this counsellor. He was pretty disengaged through the entire session - after she told him that a home was not a democracy (I love that!!) he seemed to kind of glaze over unless he was given an opportunity to make me look bad and then he was all over it. He goes to see her alone next week so we will see how that goes. I may go by myself next week too - I think I need it.
So, anyway, he skipped classes two or three more times this week. The school calls each time and I report him truant - not that they seem to be doing anything about it. Next time he skips I will call the vice principal again. Grrrr.
Fast forward to today.... I call girlfriend's house and get her dad. (I knew they weren't home - it's Friday night after all) Anyway, I say I have something sensitive I'd like to discuss with him and that the reason I am calling is because if girlfriend was my daughter then I would want to know. I tell him I'm very sure they are sexually active and that difficult child told us that he sleeps in her bed with her. girlfriend's father was kind of surprised by this - really? So, anyway, I discussed my concerns with him - their young age, neither has a job, neither is finished high school, blah blah blah.
We then move on to other topics. girlfriend's dad is discovering he isn't very ambitious. No kidding! He has been asked to cut the grass, clean up, do dishes - he doesn't do anything unless girlfriend badgers him into doing the dishes once in a while. Apparently girlfriend has to be on his case all the time to get anything done. he's probably getting worse nagging from her than he got from us - but I guess the sex wins out.
I also asked girlfriend's dad how long he was intending to let difficult child stay. He doesn't know. He'll have to talk to girlfriend and find out what is going on. So girlfriend is running the house? Or is girlfriend's mom running things and just not telling dad because they are getting divorced and I don't think they communicate with each other at all. It was just weird that my kid is living in his house and he has no idea if the kid is allowed to stay, has to go or what - he has to ask his daughter?
I get a phone call from difficult child at 11:15pm tonight asking me why I told girlfriend's dad that I would sue him if difficult child got his daughter pregnant. What? I never said that. So, I told him that I had concerns about him sleeping with girlfriend and thought that her father should know what was happening. I said maybe he is worried we will sue him but I didn't say that I would. It was an odd phone call.
Why wouldn't girlfriend's father just say - gig's up. You're not sleeping with my daughter in my home. I"m not ok with that. Is he that afraid to make his kid angry with him that he feels the need to blame it on me? Sorry dear, you can't sleep with difficult child because his parents might sue me if you get pregnant? It was just weird.