Nothing is ever enough !

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by shellyd67, Feb 1, 2011.

  1. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    It has been a rough few weeks around here.

    difficult child has been on his soapbox about never getting ANYTHING and he never has any friends over and NEVER has any sleepovers, blah, blah, blah...

    During the week (school nights) I do not allow playdates that involve dropping off and picking up.

    I do however allow difficult child to play with kids on our block once his homework is done.

    I occasionally allow a sleepover but I am not a big fan of them. husband and I work alot and we crave alone time after the kids are in bed. We do allow them maybe 1 sleepover every other month or so.

    We try to be flexible and quite frankly he has plenty of social interaction and more sleepovers than husband and I ever had.

    Nothing is EVER good enough for this kid.

    He is just plain exhausting.

    On a positive note, he complains only a few minutes and then seems to be fine whereas he used to ***** for over an hour or more.

    He is growing up and most days I just ignore his drama but today I lashed out and said " Look difficult child I am sick and tired of your complaining, knock it the heck off !"

    You are driving me nuts kid !

    Just need to vent what has been building for several weeks.

    Thanks for listening gang !
  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    The only sleepovers mine has done were one birthday party and a few girl scout things. Tell him he's lucky.
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    How true of our difficult children, nothing ever is enough!
  4. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Yep - never enough! Ever! I have so been there.

    It is very good that his complaining is not as long as it has been. Next time, catch him off guard and after his disappointments has been said and venting done say something like, "I know life isn't always as you would like it to be. It is sometimes good to vent and I want to thank you for keeping your venting short lived this time. That shows you are growing up, maturing. You are recognizing that life is not fair and there often times isn't much we can do about it."
  5. shellyd67

    shellyd67 Active Member

    HaoZi, I am LMAO because if I told him he was lucky, he would give me a list a mile long as to why he is not lucky and everyone else in has kids over all the time and sleepovers every weekend, etc...

    Truth is the kids are on block run wild and do have tons of kids running in and out and sleeping over the whole weekend. husband and I think these parents are nuts and just don't get it. They have no structure at all. difficult child barely associates with them and everytime he did play with them we had to "detox" him from being at their chaotic house.

    He always try to play the sad sack role. But he does get over things much quicker than he did a year or so ago. Thank goodness
  6. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Well, they wouldn't be kids if they didn't complain and they wouldn't be difficult children if they didn't COMPLAIN a lot!

    I wasn't too keen on the sleepovers when the kids were young like yours. A lot of supervision and work. But it gets much better as they grow older and I like knowing who my kids are friends with and enjoy having them here. I always wanted my children to feel comfortable having their friends at our house. easy child's friends literally lived here on the weekends in high school! difficult child is beginning to have a friend over once a week. It really is enlightening! Neither of my kids had "neighborhood" friends - mostly school pals.

    Here's to a quieter day!

  7. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Yeah, what's with the sleepovers, anyway? When I think back to being a kid, having a friend spend the night was a special treat...and a rare one at that!

    And now as a parent? Ugh! Sleepovers are high-stress and exhausting! difficult child should be grateful that you've allowed as many as you have!


    Sounds like we can admit you as another member of the "Mean Mommy Club"...
  8. barneysmom

    barneysmom Member

    Hi, I have lots of experience with this, especially with gfg13.

    Keep up the good work and don't let up on him.

  9. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Sleepovers seem to be the big thing around here ~ now parents are allowing coed sleepovers. kt has been invited to many of these & it's been a no go. I've allowed kt to have one person at a time over when she's stable & I know, not only the child but the parent as well.

  10. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    thank you would love to do sleepovers, but we just are not really set up for them. It helps us that his bff is not allowed to do them. Years ago his big sis had a bad experience and the parents decided never again. He can come early and stay fairly late, but it is nice not to be the meanie who says no.

    Sleepovers can be a real problem with a difficult child. Whether my kids like it or not, they are happier, healthier, easier to be around, and nicer kids when they DON"T go on sleepovers. So stick to your guns and just say "No" to sleepovers. For some families it is likely not a problem, but those families either don't have difficult children or refuse to recognize and treat their difficult children.
  11. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    We have always had lots of sleepovers here. I have never minded them at all. But, I have a big yard and the second floor of the house is the kids' floor, so I rarely see them anyway. It sure is nice when they go to other people's houses for sleepovers, too... :)

    Co-ed sleepovers? Um, no, never.