KFld
New Member
We met with the attorney yesterday, intending to file for legal seperation, but didn't end up filing anything yet.
Once she explained the entire process, which I had all wrong, I felt I wasn't ready to file for anything yet.
I didn't really know what legal seperation is. Someone told me, and this is why I have to stop listening to so many people and find out facts, that you have to be legally seperated for 90 days before you can even file for divorce. She explained that legal seperation is the same thing as divorce, except you file legal seperation for insurance reasons, etc. She also explained to both of us that no matter what we think should happen, as far as splitting everything 50/50, a judge will rule in the end what he feels is in the best interest of both of us. So I no longer need to worry about what he thinks he should get and what I really will get. She explained that after 27 years of marriage everything will be divided evenly no matter what either one of us thinks.
As far as the accounts we have, checking etc., I'm not keeping too much money in them. I don't think he would try and drain anything because it would effect his business, but I'm only leaving what I need to in there.
So we agreed to remain seperated, each continue our own counseling and not file for anything until we have had enough time and space to decide what each of us wants to do with our lives and if it's not going to be together, then we will file for divorce. I know either one of us can change this at any time. If he continues to do stupid things and I decide I'm through, then I'll file and have him served. I am not ready yet to get divorced and start splitting things up. I've had too many major changes in my life in the past month and I am no where near ready yet to make another one. I'm looking at the Spring, at least, before I'm going to know what I want, or don't want.
Thanks for all your thoughts yesterday, as always.
Once she explained the entire process, which I had all wrong, I felt I wasn't ready to file for anything yet.
I didn't really know what legal seperation is. Someone told me, and this is why I have to stop listening to so many people and find out facts, that you have to be legally seperated for 90 days before you can even file for divorce. She explained that legal seperation is the same thing as divorce, except you file legal seperation for insurance reasons, etc. She also explained to both of us that no matter what we think should happen, as far as splitting everything 50/50, a judge will rule in the end what he feels is in the best interest of both of us. So I no longer need to worry about what he thinks he should get and what I really will get. She explained that after 27 years of marriage everything will be divided evenly no matter what either one of us thinks.
As far as the accounts we have, checking etc., I'm not keeping too much money in them. I don't think he would try and drain anything because it would effect his business, but I'm only leaving what I need to in there.
So we agreed to remain seperated, each continue our own counseling and not file for anything until we have had enough time and space to decide what each of us wants to do with our lives and if it's not going to be together, then we will file for divorce. I know either one of us can change this at any time. If he continues to do stupid things and I decide I'm through, then I'll file and have him served. I am not ready yet to get divorced and start splitting things up. I've had too many major changes in my life in the past month and I am no where near ready yet to make another one. I'm looking at the Spring, at least, before I'm going to know what I want, or don't want.
Thanks for all your thoughts yesterday, as always.