Caring leads to hurt and I am too old to get my heart broken again. It may just stop beating and nobody will care.
Hi Busy.
I am sad that this is happening for you and I relate to this. I am going through something similar. I believe that we come to these places in our lives (this pain and restriction and feeling blocked, where we don't know where and to whom to turn) for a reason, and that reason is to have impetus to find a purer and truer and more meaningful way to understand ourselves, our journey and our life. If I did not believe this, I would drown in despair.
But I do believe this. I find solace in my faith. I meditate, listen to music, read, listen, and I try to find in myself the place that this resonates. I have faith that in time I will find again in connections with others, this joyful and loving space, but sometimes I despair too.
You have been through a lot and you are doing so much to understand and to put into place and to work through what has happened and what can happen. Let us try to acknowledge ourselves in a loving way, for the struggle. It is worthwhile, I think. But hard. Yes.
