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General Parenting
Observing 4 teenagers this past weekend....
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<blockquote data-quote="Doddlin" data-source="post: 367905"><p>Oh my... this is exactly what I was trying to put my finger on with my post today about easy child (Resentment and Envy over easy child). She has this idea that she is a gift to everyone and that our only role in her life is to continue to fill her full of herself. ick. She is never thankful. She calls or comes by when she has something wonderful to show us or tell us about herself. What happened to two-way "mutually" beneficial relationships? Do we really derive great joy from feeding our children's egos? Is that what they are for? </p><p></p><p>For example, she is in town this week. She came by for the big party we had to throw in her honor. (This was mother in law's request so she would feel a "part of the family". Seems we have to make sure she does since since she was estranged from the family several years ago.) No thank you for bringing the whole extended family together in her "honor" so they could brag her up and tell her just how stunning she is. Not even a thank you. Can you imagine? Then, last night she calls husband. "I am driving up your street. I wanted to come by and show you my new car." She gets all disappointed because we just didn't happen to be sitting at home waiting for her. We were out doing our own thing. Do you think she ever asks about others, how is our life, work, kids, etc.??? She has been so pumped full of herself that she expects everyone to continue it. I have such a hard time after her calls or visits. I just don't seem to get joy out of filling her more full of herself time and time again. </p><p></p><p>I think that too many people are living vicariously through their children. They brag about how they pay for this and pay for that so that the listener will think, "Wow, you are rich, you are really something, you're a great parent, your kids turned out so great, etc." These kids have no concept of giving, being thoughtful, grateful, etc. They just think they came to earth for adults to spoil... as if that is what brings us great joy. Funny, for some people it really does too.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Doddlin, post: 367905"] Oh my... this is exactly what I was trying to put my finger on with my post today about easy child (Resentment and Envy over easy child). She has this idea that she is a gift to everyone and that our only role in her life is to continue to fill her full of herself. ick. She is never thankful. She calls or comes by when she has something wonderful to show us or tell us about herself. What happened to two-way "mutually" beneficial relationships? Do we really derive great joy from feeding our children's egos? Is that what they are for? For example, she is in town this week. She came by for the big party we had to throw in her honor. (This was mother in law's request so she would feel a "part of the family". Seems we have to make sure she does since since she was estranged from the family several years ago.) No thank you for bringing the whole extended family together in her "honor" so they could brag her up and tell her just how stunning she is. Not even a thank you. Can you imagine? Then, last night she calls husband. "I am driving up your street. I wanted to come by and show you my new car." She gets all disappointed because we just didn't happen to be sitting at home waiting for her. We were out doing our own thing. Do you think she ever asks about others, how is our life, work, kids, etc.??? She has been so pumped full of herself that she expects everyone to continue it. I have such a hard time after her calls or visits. I just don't seem to get joy out of filling her more full of herself time and time again. I think that too many people are living vicariously through their children. They brag about how they pay for this and pay for that so that the listener will think, "Wow, you are rich, you are really something, you're a great parent, your kids turned out so great, etc." These kids have no concept of giving, being thoughtful, grateful, etc. They just think they came to earth for adults to spoil... as if that is what brings us great joy. Funny, for some people it really does too. [/QUOTE]
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Observing 4 teenagers this past weekend....
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