Oh what a stinking mess, literally!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jungleland, Apr 24, 2008.

  1. Jungleland

    Jungleland Welcome to my jungle!


    J is now 4 yo and almost, FINALLY, potty trained. She is developmentally about 1 year behind with anything involving the mid-line (aka balance, speech, large and small motor skills, and alas POTTY or I should say POOP training).

    Up until this past week she was refusing to even attemp to sit on the toilet to do #2. Preschool would not allow pull-ups so I was making a trip to school several times a week to change her!

    We have now just moved and are living at my sisters place, in an apartment on her property. Since there are so many other children there, around her age, all potty trained, she has been making the attempt to try #2 on the toilet. Has been successful a few times. Made a HUGE deal about it, big celebration dance, extra cookie, lots of feel goods.

    The past 3 days she is back to refusing and just disappears when I am busy elsewhere and does it in her pants. 2 days ago, we were here at husband's place doing laundry and I finally was able to catch up on some emails. She was in her old room playing with some remaining toys and was quiet, so I guess I should have known something was up.

    Went in to check on her and the smell nearly knocked me over. She had IT everywhere! She has hair past her buttootie and it was in her hair, clothes, carpet, walls, toys...everywhere. I LOST it BIG time. Smacked her bottom, once it was finally cleaned.

    She did the same thing yesterday, but not to the extreme, but still ended up having to have a full, mid-day bath.

    I am at my wits end with this. How can we go anywhere, do anything if she continues to go in her pants? I hate to put her back into pull-ups, the cost is outrageous, and she is being so successful with the potty part.

    I have noticed her "autistic" stuff is showing up a little more right now. She is on the very low end of the spectrum, she is very high functioning.

    I know that with the moves and my split with husband is definetly affecting her, but everyone has noticed how much happier she seems and how she comes "out of her shell" more now that she is not with Aly daily.

    Not sure how long I can stand the stink! HELP!!!!!

  2. JulienSam

    JulienSam New Member

    Thankfully, Sam had only one poop-smear experience -- but it still was disgusting.

    I don't know if it will work for J, but when Sam was at that stage of doing #1 fine in the potty, but not #2, we used small toys as an incentive... small army guys, actually, that came in a pack of 50 for a buck. Now plastic army guys may not appeal to J, but something similiar might work. I'd give Sam his choice of one guy if he did #1, and two guys if he did #2... Since it was an immediate reward, it worked pretty well.
    Doing this in combination of making him sit on the potty (whether he really needed to go or not) a few times a day went pretty far for us -- but each kid is different.

    Glad to hear though that she's coming out of her shell a bit more now that she's alone with- you. I'm sure the stress of the separation from H is affecting her, but it sounds like the separation from Aly is a positive thing.

    Good luck... and ((HUGS)),

  3. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    My mom and aunt still tell stories of my cousin (now 40) smearing poop all over the crib.

    I don't know what to tell you other than to have her sit on the potty for a few minutes every hour or two. That seems to be what daycare did with Jessie.

    I would go to large diapers NOT pullups. This way there is a negative to pooping in your pants. Pullups NEVER helped my kids or my niece. When they put my niece back in diapers in a very matter of fact way (well, this is what you wear when you don't poop in the potty) it only took about 2 weeks.

    Maybe the devel. pediatrician can help? Or whoever is treating her?

    Good luck!

  4. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Well - I have sympathy and empathy for you -

    Dude was encopretic at 16 - but just hid his pants. He stopped the Poopcasso urge around 8 or 9. And he's not developmentally delayed or Autistic.

    I had him potty trained at 2.....so this was really the unfair of unfair. When I did potty training - it was just sit in on the potty every hour for so many minutes with a child sized toilet seat.

    I like JulienSams idea about the reward. Our kids always respond to quick rewards. Maybe buy stuff she likes and KEEP it in the bathroom - in a mesh bag - and she can see it, and when she's sititng - she can be picking out her prize. ????

    Hoped by now things were loooking up for you!! - As far as the smell? Wash stuff in Tide and get yourself some 20 mule team boarax. In all those years it is the ONLY thing that cut the smell.

    ps - there are TONS of little kids books out there too in girl form about potty - check out the book stores and get her a special potty book - I couldn't belive how many there were.

  5. libranaster

    libranaster New Member

    I totally understand where you are coming from I mean my daughter went through the faze at 2 years old and got over it. My son on the other hand is 3 years old and the pain is not over he wont potty train at all so we are changing pull ups all the time. I am so sick of his poop you have no idea. Plus he still has days of painting the walls and his bed with it :angry-very:. Oh my god talk about stink and then it takes days if not weeks for me to Glen 20 the smell out of the house and in the mean time people are looking at me when they enter my house like I am filthy. You will see in another thread I have finally given up on him so I am feeling pretty shat house right now but I thought I would send you some love and sympathy and if you ever want to discuss poop stink I am here. Its funny how no one else wants to here your disaster stories :laugh:.
  6. Jungleland

    Jungleland Welcome to my jungle!

    Hi all. Thanks for the symathy and the suggestions. I do have a bag of "goodies" that she can choose something from when she goes in the toilet. Yesterday was, I think, day 5 of pooping in her pants. I am sooooooo done with this!

    I do take her about the time she usually goes everyday and put her on the toilet. We read stories, listen to books on tape, etc. She just sits there, sometimes pees but no poops. Then gets off the toilet and will be playing with her baby dolls and suddenly I smell the poop.

    I have tried taking away her babies, giving her one back if she makes it in the toilet. She just doesn't care.

    I have tried the "you made the stink, you clean it up" method, she thought it was cool!?!?!?!

    Have tried putting her back into pull-ups, doesn't care. Back into diapers, doesn't care. Just starts peeing as well as pooping in them, so it is undoing what she has already been doing great with, at least peeing in the toilet. She stays dry all night, hasn't had a potty accident in over a month.

    I am at the end of my rope. We couldn't go camping with friends this weekend because it would have been a nightmare if she pooped and I wouldn't have a good way of cleaning her up.

    I am soooooooo done with this crapolla, literally!!!!

  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Sending hugs. And LOTS of sympathy. If you use WASHING SODA with the 20 mule team borax, it will really help with the smell.

    {I actually don't even use regular soap for my laundry - I make laundry soap with a bar soap that is inexpensive and doesn't irritate anyone's skin, the WASHING soda (NOT baking soda - BIG DIFFERENCE), and Borax. It really works and saves a ton. }

    I use the borax and washing soda and a teeny bit of dish soap to clean walls and most everything but tubs and toilets. They get BLEACH. Well, the sink gets BLEACH too. But the washing soda is OK with ammonia and borax for poopy things.

    I know things have been rough. You really didn't need this along with all you have been dealing with.

    Just a potty story to maybe make you feel better? My mother tells me my older bro potty trained me. The ONLY way they could get me to sit still long enough to produce anything in the potty was for my bro to read to me and teach me what he did in school. I learned ALL about kindergarten while sitting on the potty!!!

    Give your furbabies a snuggle and be nice to yourself, sending lots of hugs!!