Ok, now what do I do?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by klmno, Apr 17, 2008.

  1. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I thought maybe difficult child was going to make it through the evening without raging. What an optimist I am (unbeknownst to me LOL)!

    First, he disappeared for about 40 mins. This is a HORRIBLE sign for him. Then, he raged and although it was short-lived, the things he did were frightening- enough that I now have to think psychiatric hospital. I don't know if it is this wway everywhere, but here it is almost impossible to get them in. Let's just say, you have to try to make sure there is an opening in a local psychiatric hospital or the kid could be sent anywhere. Then, of course, their idea of "immenent danger" is not exactly the same as mine. So, I made a couple of calls- so far I got no answers. I've called twice for psychiatrist and he hasn't returned a call. They did say he was in the office. And what can I expect him to do that will stop this TODAY? difficult child refused to get out of bed this morning- he is still in bed. I find it hard to believe that the zyprexa has him knocked right now. I see no signs of him being up last night- but that isn't to say it couldn't have happened. He just tells me "he is sick". I should wake hhim up, but quite frankly, I can't stand the state of mind he might be in. I can't even tell if he is shutting down or what right now. Obviously, this is not working right now.

    My gut says I will not be able to get him in. So, that means I have to sit and wait for that minute when he meets their definition of acute and miracously have the strategies in place and leave him at that point in time to try to make a phone call. RIGHT....

    Each time in the past when I have gotten to this point and throw my arms up and someone else stepped in, I have SOOOO majorly regretted it and felt horrible after he became stable because I looked back on it and could see that he was sick and needed better mental health care. But, as I sit here going through it again, the frustration of not being able to turn things around on my own or getting adequate help to do it, especially when it feels like he isn't helping himself and almost tries to make things harder on me- it makes me want to scream sometimes. But, can I really expect that he is going to be in whatever state of mind this is and willingly go to the ER of the psychiatric hospital and tell them his thoughts and actions?
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    How about a day treatment program? These programs typically run during school hours, are staffed with mental health professionals including psychiatrists and include both group and individual therapy and medication management. They can be found at psychiatric and children's hospitals.

    The child doesn't have to be as acute as needed for admission to a psychiatric hospital and isn't admitted through the ER. You should ask your psychiatrist for a referral to an appropriate program.
  3. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Who pays for it? do I just call and ask for an application, or is as tricky as getting him into a psychiatric hospital?
  4. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Our health insurance covered most of it when both my son and youngest daughter were in day treatment (there was a co-pay). Our psychiatrists referred us to the programs and called ahead to set it up. We then went in the first day and filled out all the paperwork.
  5. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I'll check into this- I know there is a place here (same place I had MDE done) that has a day treatment and school (I'm not sure if they are the same or 2 different programs. Anyway, it would appear that if he needed to go to school there, that the sd should foot the bill. Is the plan you are talking about short-term or long term?
  6. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    KLMNO- When K was Hallucinating and having suicidal Ideations last year... every place said it would be months before she could get in. I called and begged. I actually called my pediatrician and she was the most helpful. She called the psychiatric hospital as well as myself and between the 2 of us we got her in in 2 weeks!!
    They had 16 people in front of K. I don't know what she said or I said that worked? But I let them know how scared I was, how desperate we were as a family, and that they were my last chance besides to keep calling the ER. Which was not a good thing.
    I never got upset.
    I also have a great relationship with our pediatrician and she knew how bad things were.
    Just a thought. I also kept saying, I will do whatever you need, you can put me on a wait list, I can check back in, what ever.
    The only bummer is I still have not received the BILL!!! Insurance is still haggling over it... but K needed it at the time. 5 weeks. It did stabilize her at the time. Not a long term solution for us, but good for the time.

    Hang in there.
  7. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Ours was short-term. J went for 6 weeks, and M went for 5 weeks -- until our insurance ran out. The SD did not pay for anything because school was wrapped up into it (maybe 2 hours per day), but the focus was therapy.
  8. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Thank you, Ladies! I will check into this further. difficult child has gotten up and sstill swears that he is sick at his stomach. I guess this could be true, with the higher dose of lithobid plus the zyprexa, but GEEZ - sometimes, you just have to go on and do what you are supposed to do anyway, right?

    But, 2 years ago the therapist who spent 2 mos. reviewing family history and assuring me he could help, then ultimately deciding that he really didn't know what to do, TDO'd difficult child (this is one of those times I was standing there with arms thrown up in air.) Later that evening, after difficult child was checked into psychiatric hospital, I got a call from them- he had the flu and was not anywhere close to being acute. Boy, can't begin to tell you how I felt over that one. Why didn't I know? Because difficult child bolted out door to play in snow that morning instead of going to school; I called school; tthey called police; police took difficult child to therapist; therapist tdo'd him. Go figure.

    PS Smallworld, did this help your difficult child's?
  9. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Absolutely, in both cases. J was in from mid-December to end of January this year, and the attending psychiatrist straightened out his medications. He's not perfect, but he's a whole lot better than he was before.

    Good luck.
  10. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Thank you!!

    Just to get this off my chest- my first message to psychiatrist was left at 9:00 am with the added note "very important". I called again approx. 11:20. I still haven't gotten a return call.