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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
On the inside, lookin' in...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 681622" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi there. Unfortunate situation but nobody can predict if this will resolve or stay the same. Both parents are enabling her behavior so it is unlikely to improve. As this mans girlfriend only, you really cant do anything to help. Sounds like a mess. One of my kids used drigs. Sounds like she is too. Nobody can stop her but herself. Been there.</p><p></p><p>From one outsiders opinion, you may want to think hard about how much you want to get involved in this dysfunction. Do your own kids have to see this on holidays? Are you up for thus chaos for possibly the rest ofyour life? Drug users steal. What if she steals from you or one of your kids? She must know drug dealers. That puts you all in danger.</p><p></p><p>The love feeling can get us to tolerate many things we never dreamed wed tolerate. But even when one loves (l love my husband of twenty years very much)... the honeymoon infatuation does wear off and we are left with the person we fell in love with. If he has serious baggage and a necessity to keep in touch with ex, we have all that too.</p><p>Im more concerned about you than his daughter. She sounds like she is still getting alot of attention and money from dad and that she may even live with hi. I dont want you hurt. He is going to.put his daughter before you most likely. There is nothing you can do. You have no role in this. All you can do is watch and feel bad. I dont know you, but I still want better for you</p><p>You sound really.caring. Before you commit to this life, maybe seek therapy. This is like loving a man who lives in a minefield. You have decide if you want to join his war.</p><p>Hugs and warm thoughts.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 681622, member: 1550"] Hi there. Unfortunate situation but nobody can predict if this will resolve or stay the same. Both parents are enabling her behavior so it is unlikely to improve. As this mans girlfriend only, you really cant do anything to help. Sounds like a mess. One of my kids used drigs. Sounds like she is too. Nobody can stop her but herself. Been there. From one outsiders opinion, you may want to think hard about how much you want to get involved in this dysfunction. Do your own kids have to see this on holidays? Are you up for thus chaos for possibly the rest ofyour life? Drug users steal. What if she steals from you or one of your kids? She must know drug dealers. That puts you all in danger. The love feeling can get us to tolerate many things we never dreamed wed tolerate. But even when one loves (l love my husband of twenty years very much)... the honeymoon infatuation does wear off and we are left with the person we fell in love with. If he has serious baggage and a necessity to keep in touch with ex, we have all that too. Im more concerned about you than his daughter. She sounds like she is still getting alot of attention and money from dad and that she may even live with hi. I dont want you hurt. He is going to.put his daughter before you most likely. There is nothing you can do. You have no role in this. All you can do is watch and feel bad. I dont know you, but I still want better for you You sound really.caring. Before you commit to this life, maybe seek therapy. This is like loving a man who lives in a minefield. You have decide if you want to join his war. Hugs and warm thoughts. [/QUOTE]
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