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Parent Emeritus
One year ago today for my difficult child...
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 634874" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>IAD, I've done a lot of crying throughout my life, but in the last few years, when my daughter's life really spiraled out of control, I cried more then I ever have. And, I understand your feelings about your husband's concern for you when you cry............for me, I got to a point awhile back that I just couldn't hold those tears in any more and I broke down a number of times with my husband (then SO), and what happened in those vulnerable moments of such grief is that having someone else hold my grief with me was amazingly cathartic and ended up being somehow more profound and also much more of a release. The risk to share that level of sorrow was so healing. It became a lot easier to do it after I had broken down a number of times..............I got really good at it!!</p><p></p><p>And, there is an end to it too. I think as we get better at releasing all of our feelings and not being stoic or afraid, we end up releasing so much of that grief and fear, little by little and it lessens considerably and quickly too. It's not inside of us anymore, it is expressed, as it should be. Like babies do, they release their feelings without editing them........as we get older we learn to edit ourselves. That is not always healthy, it can be a detriment to " be strong." The ability to be vulnerable has enormous strength in it. It takes courage to feel. </p><p></p><p>Thinking of you IAD, wishing you peace of mind and truckloads of serenity............</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 634874, member: 13542"] IAD, I've done a lot of crying throughout my life, but in the last few years, when my daughter's life really spiraled out of control, I cried more then I ever have. And, I understand your feelings about your husband's concern for you when you cry............for me, I got to a point awhile back that I just couldn't hold those tears in any more and I broke down a number of times with my husband (then SO), and what happened in those vulnerable moments of such grief is that having someone else hold my grief with me was amazingly cathartic and ended up being somehow more profound and also much more of a release. The risk to share that level of sorrow was so healing. It became a lot easier to do it after I had broken down a number of times..............I got really good at it!! And, there is an end to it too. I think as we get better at releasing all of our feelings and not being stoic or afraid, we end up releasing so much of that grief and fear, little by little and it lessens considerably and quickly too. It's not inside of us anymore, it is expressed, as it should be. Like babies do, they release their feelings without editing them........as we get older we learn to edit ourselves. That is not always healthy, it can be a detriment to " be strong." The ability to be vulnerable has enormous strength in it. It takes courage to feel. Thinking of you IAD, wishing you peace of mind and truckloads of serenity............ [/QUOTE]
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One year ago today for my difficult child...
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