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General Parenting
Open Topic - Preserving our easy child Relationships
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<blockquote data-quote="Mikey" data-source="post: 29775" data-attributes="member: 3579"><p>Thanks for everyone's input so far. For me, this is a very important subject because I've lived it twice; once as the brother of a difficult child, and now as the parent of one. My mother was a single mom, who was also taking care of HER mom in the later stages of ALS. I vividly remember all the time my Mom put in to keeping my brother alive and out of jail. He got the private school while I got beat up daily at public school. He got special doctor visits and other things while I was expected to just chug along. I was angry, upset, and didn't like the favoritism I thought I was seeing.</p><p></p><p>It wasn't until I was a parent that I understood the actual pain my mother was going through. When there's not enough to go around, you ration what you have to the neediest, and hope the others can make it through. It did get a little better after my grandmother mercifully passed away, but only for a while. Then my family history of alcoholism caught up with Mom and we pretty much lost her forever after that.</p><p></p><p>I look at her situation, and after years of anger and frustration at both her and my brother, I'm finally able to let go because I understand she was doing the very best she could, with what she had, at the time. But it also highlights just how much impact a difficult child sibling can have on the other kids, and I was curious how others on this board are dealing with that situation.</p><p></p><p>Thanks so much for everyone's responses, and I look forward to reading more if they pop up on this thread.</p><p></p><p>Mikey</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mikey, post: 29775, member: 3579"] Thanks for everyone's input so far. For me, this is a very important subject because I've lived it twice; once as the brother of a difficult child, and now as the parent of one. My mother was a single mom, who was also taking care of HER mom in the later stages of ALS. I vividly remember all the time my Mom put in to keeping my brother alive and out of jail. He got the private school while I got beat up daily at public school. He got special doctor visits and other things while I was expected to just chug along. I was angry, upset, and didn't like the favoritism I thought I was seeing. It wasn't until I was a parent that I understood the actual pain my mother was going through. When there's not enough to go around, you ration what you have to the neediest, and hope the others can make it through. It did get a little better after my grandmother mercifully passed away, but only for a while. Then my family history of alcoholism caught up with Mom and we pretty much lost her forever after that. I look at her situation, and after years of anger and frustration at both her and my brother, I'm finally able to let go because I understand she was doing the very best she could, with what she had, at the time. But it also highlights just how much impact a difficult child sibling can have on the other kids, and I was curious how others on this board are dealing with that situation. Thanks so much for everyone's responses, and I look forward to reading more if they pop up on this thread. Mikey [/QUOTE]
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