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<blockquote data-quote="Barbara" data-source="post: 32176" data-attributes="member: 525"><p>thanks for your comments, just to be clear i understand spanking is not affective, we typically don't use this as a form of discipline, normally it's time outs. not that they have lasting affects with difficult child either.. I do the whole give him time, and then talk about what happened.. in his mind he never does anything wrong. and things are always someone else's fault. Even when he finally realizes that his behavior was not acceptable, it doesn't change... he doesn't learn from anything. rewards don't work, praise doesn't work. He lives in the moment and is very egocentric. behavior mod doesn't work with him, as he lives in the moment. he doesn't care about consequences.he believes that anyone correcting him for anything is being unfair... believe me I do detatch often.. I let things slide and pick carefully the things he is corrected for... the funny thing is family members who know... think i am too soft on him... i think that's why i find this so upsetting.. i could never physically hurt my kids. My whole life is revolved around doing for him, and this just makes me feel hopeless</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Barbara, post: 32176, member: 525"] thanks for your comments, just to be clear i understand spanking is not affective, we typically don't use this as a form of discipline, normally it's time outs. not that they have lasting affects with difficult child either.. I do the whole give him time, and then talk about what happened.. in his mind he never does anything wrong. and things are always someone else's fault. Even when he finally realizes that his behavior was not acceptable, it doesn't change... he doesn't learn from anything. rewards don't work, praise doesn't work. He lives in the moment and is very egocentric. behavior mod doesn't work with him, as he lives in the moment. he doesn't care about consequences.he believes that anyone correcting him for anything is being unfair... believe me I do detatch often.. I let things slide and pick carefully the things he is corrected for... the funny thing is family members who know... think i am too soft on him... i think that's why i find this so upsetting.. i could never physically hurt my kids. My whole life is revolved around doing for him, and this just makes me feel hopeless [/QUOTE]
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