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Our IEP meeting that was not ugly
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 504298" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>Diane that is just beautiful.</p><p></p><p>In regard to the time out room.... if he responds that way and it is done ONCE that is of course your choice and it could work for sure. Q was in a school where I had to sign a paper because every kid in the school's parents had to sign it. It was not even part of his individual plan. They started using it for power battles and unlicensed people started making the decision to put him there for long periods of time. I would just suggest checking with the state dept of ed for teh statutes for time limits. If a procedure like that is used here three times a month or more there must be a mandatory IEP meeting because the IEP is not addressing the lack of skills and trigger problems that are leading to the behaviors.</p><p></p><p>AND there is an alternative... if they can develop that room to be a sensory integration room....he can go there to calm down. He can go there at the beginning of any signs of anxiety which is important because kids hate the sensory rooms eventually if they are only used when they are in trouble. </p><p></p><p>In his plan, before you sign off make sure there are time limits and that you get a complete written report of what happened including the setting, the adults and how many peers were involved, what THEY said and what he said...they usually just write the awful things the kids do and of course that does not help us identify triggers and patterns.</p><p></p><p>Trust your gut, but watch how they interpret this. These kinds of rooms in our state are legally only to be used if there is risk of serious bodily harm or major property damage. I dont know the mandates in your state and you are so prepared that I am sure you know better than I but just sharing our experience with this because the district got in a lot of trouble for making us all sign that paper instead of it being individualized. Not to mention the reasons they used it.</p><p></p><p></p><p>No worries about Q's situation, ENJOY your success, I have had many and started on this board on a four year HIGH with how things were going. Continue your record keeping and relationships, I am sure that is why I am still allowed in the building. Another mom with a child like Q last year was escorted out of the building and shut out of everything... they DID press charges against her Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) child because they took a toy that they gave her away by grabbing it and when she ran after it she bit the hand that wouldn't give it back. She had a PBIP and clearly it did NOT say to grab a toy that made some noises that bothered others away. Really provoked her. this mom had terrible relationships and screammed and left minutes long rants on phone message machines etc. I had done pca work with her daughter since I wasn't working in the schools and she would go off on me suddenly too but I understood her. (I think she was bipolar and I really did care for her and understood her worries about her daughter) This is why I have been more on guard at this school because even though things were good, I knew they had this side to them.</p><p></p><p>You totally rocked this one out and it is how it SHOULD be. There is always give and take. No one likes to be hit and it makes me crazy that they think we dont understand that or want to help. But we want them to help in appropriate ways. Not to just warehouse and punish. You are AWESOME and an example of how we can all do this. YEAH for both your boys for having you on their sides. !!!!!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 504298, member: 12886"] Diane that is just beautiful. In regard to the time out room.... if he responds that way and it is done ONCE that is of course your choice and it could work for sure. Q was in a school where I had to sign a paper because every kid in the school's parents had to sign it. It was not even part of his individual plan. They started using it for power battles and unlicensed people started making the decision to put him there for long periods of time. I would just suggest checking with the state dept of ed for teh statutes for time limits. If a procedure like that is used here three times a month or more there must be a mandatory IEP meeting because the IEP is not addressing the lack of skills and trigger problems that are leading to the behaviors. AND there is an alternative... if they can develop that room to be a sensory integration room....he can go there to calm down. He can go there at the beginning of any signs of anxiety which is important because kids hate the sensory rooms eventually if they are only used when they are in trouble. In his plan, before you sign off make sure there are time limits and that you get a complete written report of what happened including the setting, the adults and how many peers were involved, what THEY said and what he said...they usually just write the awful things the kids do and of course that does not help us identify triggers and patterns. Trust your gut, but watch how they interpret this. These kinds of rooms in our state are legally only to be used if there is risk of serious bodily harm or major property damage. I dont know the mandates in your state and you are so prepared that I am sure you know better than I but just sharing our experience with this because the district got in a lot of trouble for making us all sign that paper instead of it being individualized. Not to mention the reasons they used it. No worries about Q's situation, ENJOY your success, I have had many and started on this board on a four year HIGH with how things were going. Continue your record keeping and relationships, I am sure that is why I am still allowed in the building. Another mom with a child like Q last year was escorted out of the building and shut out of everything... they DID press charges against her Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) child because they took a toy that they gave her away by grabbing it and when she ran after it she bit the hand that wouldn't give it back. She had a PBIP and clearly it did NOT say to grab a toy that made some noises that bothered others away. Really provoked her. this mom had terrible relationships and screammed and left minutes long rants on phone message machines etc. I had done pca work with her daughter since I wasn't working in the schools and she would go off on me suddenly too but I understood her. (I think she was bipolar and I really did care for her and understood her worries about her daughter) This is why I have been more on guard at this school because even though things were good, I knew they had this side to them. You totally rocked this one out and it is how it SHOULD be. There is always give and take. No one likes to be hit and it makes me crazy that they think we dont understand that or want to help. But we want them to help in appropriate ways. Not to just warehouse and punish. You are AWESOME and an example of how we can all do this. YEAH for both your boys for having you on their sides. !!!!!! [/QUOTE]
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