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General Parenting
Out of control 15yo son breaking my heart and the law
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<blockquote data-quote="BloodiedButUnbowed" data-source="post: 719845" data-attributes="member: 13303"><p>So sorry you are going through this, our stories are very different but somehow all the same.</p><p></p><p>You have come to the right place. In our own way we all understand what you are going through.</p><p></p><p>From what you say it sounds like substance abuse is playing a large part in your son's behavior. It can be hard to tell the difference between the effects of drug use and mental illness.</p><p></p><p>It sounds to me that you feel very defeated and powerless. From my experience, taking care of yourself and finding your "inner strength" is key to things turning around for YOU - regardless of what your son does.</p><p></p><p>You are the parent, therefore even if you don't feel like it all of the time, YOU are the boss - not him. YOU decide what is acceptable in your home and if he refuses to abide by your rules, YOU get to decide the consequences.</p><p></p><p>If my child was skipping school, I would allow the resource officer to write him truancy tickets. Allow his legal problems to multiply. If he is committing crimes, he should feel the full impact of his decisions.</p><p></p><p>I would schedule an appointment with a psychologist to evaluate him. If he won't go, YOU go by yourself. The psychologist will be able to offer you advice, feedback and a caring ear.</p><p></p><p>Is his father in the picture? Is he supportive? Are there any other relatives or close family friends with whom he is close and to whom he might listen?</p><p></p><p>Some parents get to a point where their children will not listen to reason and refuse to abide by the basic rules of the household. In these cases, sometimes, these parents must find the strength to put the child out to either a relative, a private residential school, or the court system. This is not an easy decision but sometimes it is necessary.</p><p></p><p>Keep us posted, we are here for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BloodiedButUnbowed, post: 719845, member: 13303"] So sorry you are going through this, our stories are very different but somehow all the same. You have come to the right place. In our own way we all understand what you are going through. From what you say it sounds like substance abuse is playing a large part in your son's behavior. It can be hard to tell the difference between the effects of drug use and mental illness. It sounds to me that you feel very defeated and powerless. From my experience, taking care of yourself and finding your "inner strength" is key to things turning around for YOU - regardless of what your son does. You are the parent, therefore even if you don't feel like it all of the time, YOU are the boss - not him. YOU decide what is acceptable in your home and if he refuses to abide by your rules, YOU get to decide the consequences. If my child was skipping school, I would allow the resource officer to write him truancy tickets. Allow his legal problems to multiply. If he is committing crimes, he should feel the full impact of his decisions. I would schedule an appointment with a psychologist to evaluate him. If he won't go, YOU go by yourself. The psychologist will be able to offer you advice, feedback and a caring ear. Is his father in the picture? Is he supportive? Are there any other relatives or close family friends with whom he is close and to whom he might listen? Some parents get to a point where their children will not listen to reason and refuse to abide by the basic rules of the household. In these cases, sometimes, these parents must find the strength to put the child out to either a relative, a private residential school, or the court system. This is not an easy decision but sometimes it is necessary. Keep us posted, we are here for you. [/QUOTE]
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Out of control 15yo son breaking my heart and the law
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