outcome of sexual harrassment at work

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by upallnight, Mar 15, 2013.

  1. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    My union found him to have done nothing wrong. They even put me back on duties that would have me run into this creep. That's okay, I put up a folder next to my face when I walk down the hallway. My union said they can't do anything. I think is wrong but don't want to make waves.

    Plus I photocopied the letter he sent me and faxed it to his wifes offices, she's a principal in 2 schools. I wonder if she thinks anythings wrong with that. I just did this today. He said he can't stop thinking about me and not that he wants to.Revenge is sweet.
  2. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    If he keeps it up, file again. And again. Pretty soon... UGH I hate that.

  3. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Ok, so sexual harassment didn't work.

    If he continues........I'd go talk to the police about stalking charges. If they think it's enough, then by darn I'd nail his fanny for that. Start documenting any time he seeks you out that you don't have to directly work together. And continue to turn him in for harassment. ugh
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Harassment is hard to prove. That's why when X from work tried to get me for harassment my lawyer just laughed. She would have to prove he is constantly writing to her, showing up at her house, calling etc. If she can do THAT, then she can probably get a restraining order against him.

    Stories like this one with the union being so wussy is why I'm not sure I ever want to go back to work again. Honestly, I thought unions stuck up for the people who paid into them.
  5. HaoZi

    HaoZi CD Hall of Fame

    I wonder if his wife got it and realized it was from him and NOT to her? If so... ouch. Heh. And I'm with Hound - if he continues, see what the stalking laws are in your state.
  6. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Ug sorry you still have to face the creep. Maybe you could wear a mini-cam at work and record him if necessary. There are many cheap survalience devices available on the internet. Then you would have proof that could not be ignored. -RM
  7. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    She knew it was to someone else because he dated it February 14 and called me his valentine! So it wouldn't be something she had gotten. The man admitted to all things according to the people in charge of investigating. The car stalking...he was just being a nice guy doncha know. Offering me a ride ater waiting for me oustside......who does that? I have a car, he wanted me to go somewhere else.
    I showed this letter to everyone at work, a copy because I gave back the original. He can be ashamed, not me. Sorry for the errors, I'm typing on the phone. They did say if he does 1 thing more- he will be charged with sexual harrassment. I guess that is my word against his, so ....I diddocument everything.
  8. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Your principal is ok with that? I'm worried they'll keep him, not you if he continues. It's maddening. I like the surveillance idea. Have your phone out whenever he's around you.
  9. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I think the principal is just following what shes told. When I first showed her the letter, she was as horrified as I was. I hope he does one more thing so I can go to the police and get a RO. For now, I hope jis wife sees what a creep he is and is mad at him.
  10. Tiapet

    Tiapet Old Hand

    Uan, I'm so sorry you have to go through this. It just stinks! Early on in life when I worked somewhere I was a victim of this as well. Of course I was barely 18 and so very naive about life in general. The company, which wasn't union, stood by the older gentleman and made me out to be the one leading him on and I knew in no way was I. Heck, this guy was from Jordan, was living with a female while he already had a wife back in his country! That alone spoke volumes but irregardless, I was a young 18 year old in their mind and I was the one not him. I ended up fired in the end and he got away with it all! I was mortified for a very long time and to this day it has effected me.

    I'm so glad you are strong and doing all the things necessary to nail his butt to the wall. This is just one step for you to get him and I know you will! Hang in there.....(hugs)
  11. donna723

    donna723 Well-Known Member

    Boy, were they ever WRONG!!! I worked for the State for 24 years and we used to have classes in this sort of thing. We didn't officially have a union but we had an employees association and we went by Civil Service procedures. If someone where I worked had done even a tenth of what this man has done to you, they would have immediately been put on administrative leave until they could have a due process hearing ... then they would be fired! You can take this further, you know. MUCH further!
  12. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Let me guess...
    1) he has more seniority than you, and
    2) the person/people responsible for this case are male

    Sorry to sound simplistic, but... I worked in a place where they used to brag that there couldn't possibly be any of that stuff happening in "our" firm, because there were no successful harassment claims. And then, finally, a new head honcho put a (very capable and universally respected) WOMAN in charge of the harassment investigations and... heads rolled, fast.
  13. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I'm going to tell the union I need them to do something more, there is a main office for the union in my county. I'm going to exlpain all this to them, the local rep from the school next door isn't helpful. I think he's just lazy. I can go further than him.

    They're all male, yes. He has seniority and he has a history of doing this to 2 others. The other women had actually had affairs with them. THEY were sent to the Superintendant's office because they were hanging around him. Both of them. My Principal told me this, she was the one who sent them.

    Thanks for the excellent advice. This isn't the end.
  14. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Have you read your union handbook and your employee handbook recently? I strongly recommend it. Bringing him up on sexual harassment charges is difficult, and many employers do NOT want to deal with all of that litigation.

    People who violatethis type of law usually break other laws as well. Document everything and chances are you will end up with proof of other unsavory behavior, behavior that he CAN be fired for and/or prosecuted for.
  15. donna723

    donna723 Well-Known Member

    Is this man also a member of your union? If he is, it seems like this would be a conflict of interest. It would be like one attorney representing both sides of a dispute. I mean, are they representing you or are they representing him? Are they trying to do right by you and comply with the laws or are they trying to help him keep his job? I hope you will carry this farther because it is soooo wrong!
  16. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I e-mailed the union rep and told him I disagreed with all of this, mentioning how I am so upset all day...etc...I told him I wanted a lawyer from the union to speak with. He replied already and said he will go forward with this.

    I know before I get my own lawyer, I must exhaust all union help. Otherwise the school district will say, "Why didn't you go to your union?, Why didn't you follow up?" etc....Then they would just blame the union and they themselves would not be responsible. If it gets to the point where I need my own lawyer, they litigate against the union as well as the school district (then they both blame each other) .

    Many years ago I was fired for having breast cancer. The union and the store blamed each other, ultimately the store was responsible though. But the union was against me 100% as well because they were sued.

    I am going to keep mentioning how uncomfortable I am to my Principal, just so they can never say that they thought everything was ok when I'm saying it's not. This is all excellent advice, thank you.
  17. buddy

    buddy New Member

    His poor wife.
  18. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I wonder just how angry his wife is? If you know her name, it might be interesting to see if she uses facebook or twitter or whatever. If she is active on social media, she might write about the situation.

    Wouldn't she be just a font of information and possibly proof if she was angry enough with him? I have known some wives who were cheated on who connected with the 'other woman' to get proof for the divorce and custody proceedings. Of course you should not approach her directly at this point, just poke around facebook/twitter/whatever and google her name. You might be surprised at what you find.
  19. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I recently found out her name and where she works. I faxed his love letter to me to her entire offices, she has 2. I cut out my name, je wrote it, signed it, and it's only his writing. She knows her husbands handwriting so he can't talk or explain this away to her. She works about 20 minutes away in another school cistrict in 2 s hools that are connected. It takes me so long to type, sorry for the mistakes.She is the Principal to both schools. So, my name is on nothing and it's dated by him 2-14-13. She may think I went for him, but she xefinately knows his intentions were to cheat either wa y. I feel bad fpr her but that letter can help her to know what he is up to, and proof. If my husband did this I woild want to know. I did nothing wrong.

    I just told my husband that I contacted my union and am protesting all these f'ed up reports. He told me to drop it and he thinks this will get me fired. He has NO IDEA I went ahead and faxed that to his wife. I am feeling very unsupported, especially since every day he asks me if my stalker bothered me and if he should beat
  20. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    him up. Joking of course. I'm just going to tell you ladies all my updates, I told husband I will never talk about this to him again. You are all giving me the strength to not second guess myself. I'm scared and nervous even today for some reason, like I can't think straight. I just want this man charged so he can leave the building. husband is a man, he just wants to beat him up, he says he will take care of it if anything happens. So there is no worries according to him.