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Parent Emeritus
Overwhelming Pain
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 661445" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>You are not responsible for the difficult life your child has so far lived. Maybe she needs to blame somebody so it's you. I wasn't there. I don't know. I do know that wondering what we did wrong is a waste of time. Half the time, they can't even articulate it.</p><p></p><p>The only person who can control your daughter is your daughter. We have control over just ourselves, but we can learn to change our thinking and attitude and reaction to our adult children who want to "punish" us for their own reasons. Worrying about them makes us sick and stressed and does not help them one bit. Slowly learning detachment skills and how to move on so that YOU can have a life I feel works the best.</p><p></p><p>It is always very hurtful, but you CAN learn how to live a great life in spite of your daughter. Just keep posting and reading how we do it.</p><p></p><p>Hugs for your hurting heart. It is sad that parents of transgendered youth shun them for things they can't control, but your daughter wasn't shunned. It makes no sense to treat you as if you had shunned her...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 661445, member: 1550"] You are not responsible for the difficult life your child has so far lived. Maybe she needs to blame somebody so it's you. I wasn't there. I don't know. I do know that wondering what we did wrong is a waste of time. Half the time, they can't even articulate it. The only person who can control your daughter is your daughter. We have control over just ourselves, but we can learn to change our thinking and attitude and reaction to our adult children who want to "punish" us for their own reasons. Worrying about them makes us sick and stressed and does not help them one bit. Slowly learning detachment skills and how to move on so that YOU can have a life I feel works the best. It is always very hurtful, but you CAN learn how to live a great life in spite of your daughter. Just keep posting and reading how we do it. Hugs for your hurting heart. It is sad that parents of transgendered youth shun them for things they can't control, but your daughter wasn't shunned. It makes no sense to treat you as if you had shunned her... [/QUOTE]
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