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peculiar friend
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 699059" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>You know I am thinking more about my sister here. Who wants nothing to do with me. Nothing. The relationship was distant for almost all of our adult lives. And then she became very angry at me. And she had acted very, very badly.</p><p></p><p>The thing is around the time she decided to renounce me completely, I was coming to understand that <em>I had been wrong</em> nearly my whole life. I blamed her because I was very poor at protecting myself, at standing up for myself and because I could not accept her as imperfect.</p><p></p><p>I punished her by distancing myself, not because I did not love her, but because I did not like her. This, I now think, was quite unfortunate. Most of all to me. Because the result was that I did not develop in ways I would of or could have had I accepted her (and myself) as imperfect.</p><p></p><p>People do wrong and hurtful things all of the time. By not using our G-d given words to speak up is really a sad, sad thing. Nomad your fried gave you a gift *here are your words: <u>BUT, she seemed calm and appreciative of my honesty.</u> In my experience, friendship or any other relationship does not get better than this.</p><p></p><p>I could not speak with honesty about my feelings to either my sister or my mother. Both of them would react with the sense of having been grievously harmed and wronged if I even tried to speak up. Therefore in my life I clammed up and retreated. It was the wrong to do for everybody concerned. Especially me.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 699059, member: 18958"] You know I am thinking more about my sister here. Who wants nothing to do with me. Nothing. The relationship was distant for almost all of our adult lives. And then she became very angry at me. And she had acted very, very badly. The thing is around the time she decided to renounce me completely, I was coming to understand that [I]I had been wrong[/I] nearly my whole life. I blamed her because I was very poor at protecting myself, at standing up for myself and because I could not accept her as imperfect. I punished her by distancing myself, not because I did not love her, but because I did not like her. This, I now think, was quite unfortunate. Most of all to me. Because the result was that I did not develop in ways I would of or could have had I accepted her (and myself) as imperfect. People do wrong and hurtful things all of the time. By not using our G-d given words to speak up is really a sad, sad thing. Nomad your fried gave you a gift *here are your words: [U]BUT, she seemed calm and appreciative of my honesty.[/U] In my experience, friendship or any other relationship does not get better than this. I could not speak with honesty about my feelings to either my sister or my mother. Both of them would react with the sense of having been grievously harmed and wronged if I even tried to speak up. Therefore in my life I clammed up and retreated. It was the wrong to do for everybody concerned. Especially me. [/QUOTE]
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