Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by nateisnuts, Jul 17, 2008.

  1. nateisnuts

    nateisnuts New Member

    adrianne made this question pop into my head :D do pets make a difference in behavior with children with adhd/odd/dbd type of problems? adrianne's is 11 (right?) but my son is only 3. so im wondering if anyone has had or has pets with difficult child's this young and has it made a positive difference? weve been tossing around the idea of a dog for awhile, but just not sure with everything he has going on Know what I mean??
  2. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    I think it very much depends on the child and on the pet. In some it is a benefit. Others are impatient or violent towards the pets.

    At our house we have a difficult child cat and difficult child and the difficult child cat are always butting heads. He likes the bunny but she's outdoors and not underfoot and in his stuff.
  3. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    This is very tough... for us cats are wonderful. Dogs, have been wonderful for N. Not so much for K.
    We had no clue how either would respond. K just get worse while N gets better.
  4. OpenWindow

    OpenWindow Active Member

    My difficult child has always loved animals. He was great with our little shihtzhu when he was your son's age. We did have to be careful that he wasn't too rough when he was playing. When he was in 3rd grade I think, we got him his own puppy. He took him to obedience school, took care of feeding him, and slept with him. He is still difficult child's dog and has been great - difficult child doesn't have many friends and I think him having a dog has helped him in many areas, from developing empathy to learning patience and just having someone around who loves you unconditionally.

    How does he react around dogs? We could tell from a very young age that our difficult child had a special relationship with animals.
  5. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    You just don't know. A pet can teach social skills, but you need either a certain level of social capability already, or a very tolerant (and physically tough) pet.

  6. nateisnuts

    nateisnuts New Member

    we want to get a puggle, they are sturdy, good with kids and dont shed much. difficult child has always been very interested in animals and seems to be very sweet and loving with the ones he has contact with. so im in search now lol ive been checking my local papers and craigs list, so well see what happens :)
  7. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I had a Lhasa Apso when Miss KT was born, and they got along wonderfully well. He stayed right with her, and I have a great picture of her trading his biscuit for her teething cookie. Both of them were pleased with the trade.

    With my Jack Russell, I wouldn't have any little kids around him. He's too unpredictable.
  8. Marg's Man

    Marg's Man Member

    What do you guys call a puggle?

    To us, a puggle is a baby platypus or echidna.

    V-E-R-Y hard to get at all and certainly not legally.

    ...and even harder to keep alive.

    Marg's Man
  9. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Marg's Man: A puggle is a cross between a pug and a beagle.
  10. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Big difference, with the puggle.

    When I Googled "puggle" I got three photos. Two were baby monotremes. One was a dog.

    Here is a link:

    I hope the breeder's association doesn't register the name "puggle", it could get very confusing.

    About pets - we're making great strides with the budgies. They need gentle handling and they also do better when the person handling them is calm. They seem to sense your mood. The first budgies we got, two years ago, were allegedly hand-raised young ones but we now realise they were cage-raised older birds (several months old at least) and well used to being in a large flight cage with a large flock. Although those two bonded well to each other, they were VERY difficult to handle, very wild.

    However, there are some GREAT websites with information and since then I've learned that even the really wild budgies can be tamed. I want to make it clear - when I say "wild" budgies, I do not mean budgies taken from the wild. We wouldn't do that. Besides, we are too far south. Wild budgies live in the north of Australia, especially around Kakadu.

    One of the budgies died last year just after we got back form New Zealand. We think it caught flu from difficult child 1, who was looking after them. Daisy, the remaining budgie, really missed her mate and became even harder to handle.

    A few months ago we bought (from a pet shop this time) a baby budgie. He's a little bigger (which tells me he's an English budgie, a domesticated variety many generations removed from the wild). He was quite 'wild' when we got him, he tried to bite the shop assistant as soon as she reached in to grab him. He was too young to be able to bite down hard, though. And he tried to bite us a few times - same result. His wing was over-clipped, so he can't fly very well although he's learning to adapt.

    The thing is, he's become tame very quickly because difficult child 3 has been handling him a lot. A clipped budgie that can't fly very far is very dependent on his owner to read his signals and tend to his needs. Lucky the budgie learned very quickly that we would take him where he wanted to go; and he indicates where he wants to go by taking off and trying to fly in that direction. Sometimes he just cranes his neck in that direction. He chirps a lot just before he takes off, we're recognising his signals there, too. And because of his clipped wing, he flies a few feet and descends to the floor. When he lands, he trots around craning his neck for us to come pick him up and take him to his cage, or to the perch where Daisy is sitting.

    Lucky has been hand-tame since his first week. And then we discovered (through a very useful website) that you can train budgies with reward food, especially millet. And much as Lucky enjoys his seed and being carried, he goes crazy over millet.
    Then we introduced Daisy to millet. Taming her isn't easy, she's two years old and very skittish. But she will now tolerate a hand in her cage. That took about two months of patience and persistence. She also will go back to her cage at sunset. And once she learned about millet, she saw that Lucky was getting fed a lot of millet while sitting on my arm so she will now perch on my arm at the same time, sharing the millet.

    We may never get any further than that with Daisy, but Lucky's extreme tameness and gentle nature make up for it. difficult child 3 spends most of his time at home, with Lucky perched on his shoulder. Lucky hears difficult child 3's voice in the morning and begins to chirp loudly, repeatedly, asking to be got out of his cage.

    Mess - minimal. A seed-fed budgie has dry droppings and not many of those. We made a play-gym tree stand thing, which Lucky can spend time perched on. Droppings can collect under that, but we can take it outside or empty it over the bin. Daisy perches in my bathroom over the loo and droppings collect on the cistern. We have a paper towel there to catch droppings, so it's easy to change that over.

    Other food - we're getting them used to at least trying fresh vegetables, but neither of them is really keep to do more than taste.

    For a smarter version of a budgie, but almost the same size - a cockatiel is great.

    Anything much larger can be louder, or a problem in other ways. Larger parrots are also more long-lived and hence are a longer-term responsibility. But they make wonderful pets, if you're inclined to taming them and allowing them freedom outside a cage.

    It does take responsible ownership and supervision with younger children, though.

    easy child 2/difficult child 2's exBF had a pet Rainbow Lorikeet which sadly spent most of its time in the (admittedly large) cage. The boy was at school most of the time and then out with friends while the mother was either at work or out at night socialising ("Son? WHAT son? Oh, THAT kid?"). She badly neglected her son's emotional needs so you can imagine what she was like with the bird. Poor thing was a basket case when we met him, trying to mate with his water dish. Apart from saying his name and screeching, the only sound he made was to imitate a ringing telephone. It was probably the only sound it ever heard for most of the days.

    So anyway, that's my bid in for a bird as a pet.

  11. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    Nateisnuts, would you kindly add a signature so that posters are better able to see what issues your difficult child is dealing with? Go to the User CP tab at the upper left and it only takes a few minutes. We do ask parents not to include pictures or any other info that could help identify your child.
  12. tjg4god

    tjg4god just me

    Just wanted to tell you about our experience with pets. 8 year old difficult child has shih tzu indoors. It really helped him as far as companionship however difficult child 2 who has the dbd and mood disorders likes the dog but cannot control the urge to hurt him. He pulls his hair and tail, pinches him and chokes him to the point we are not sure if we should keep the dog but then again it is not fair to difficult child 1 to get rid of him because his brother acts out. So we try to keep them seperated as much as possible. Now that being said we have 2 big dogs outside and when difficult child plays with them he don't do those things. So maybe if you get a bigger dog than your difficult child he might not have issues with hurting it. don't know if this helps but I hope so. Good luck and keep us updated.;)
  13. nateisnuts

    nateisnuts New Member

    thank you guys! ive talked it over with hubby and with mom and dad, since we live on their property lol and we are gonna start looking around...i think the biggest we can go for our space though is the puggle or maybe alab mix with something a little smaller. thank you again!