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Please help with our decision to bail 36 yr old son out of jail..
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<blockquote data-quote="PonyGirl65" data-source="post: 682562" data-attributes="member: 20087"><p>Hi Changes,</p><p>Just wanted to add my "Welcome Home" and say I'm so glad you found us here! </p><p></p><p>I have a 31 year old son who has been in jail on & off for half his lifetime now. It used to be the worst thing I could ever imagine that my son would go to jail, that evolved into relief "Shew! Now I know where he is, he's warm, safe, and fed" </p><p></p><p>I did bail him out ONE time, years and years ago, because he was working a job and I checked with his boss who assured me he'd be welcome back if he could come in to work. I didn't get 'burned' on that, many months later when the case came to court, I was given a full refund of the bail I paid.</p><p></p><p>Didn't stop him from continuing his destructive path. I have never bailed him out again, nor have I visited him while he's been in. Not any of the umpteen times.</p><p></p><p>A few weeks ago, he was sentenced on 3 (more) felony (drug) charges and now faces 5 years in Prison.</p><p></p><p>Breathe. Pray. Repeat.</p><p></p><p>So....it used to be the worst thing I could ever imagine that my son would go to Prison. Today, the thought is..."Well, the State has better programs to offer than the County." (Oy!)</p><p></p><p>I think the point I finally came to is: It's out of my hands. HE's the one getting arrested. HE's the one breaking the law. It's not about ME anymore. We all know that doesn't end when they hit the magical age of 18, but as that was 13 years ago now, I've got some distance from the whole "rotten mother" syndrome.</p><p></p><p>This is about HIM now. I love him to pieces, he's my favorite person in the whole world. And he knows that. He also knows, don't ask me for money <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p><p></p><p>Gentle Hugs to you ~ and Peace</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PonyGirl65, post: 682562, member: 20087"] Hi Changes, Just wanted to add my "Welcome Home" and say I'm so glad you found us here! I have a 31 year old son who has been in jail on & off for half his lifetime now. It used to be the worst thing I could ever imagine that my son would go to jail, that evolved into relief "Shew! Now I know where he is, he's warm, safe, and fed" I did bail him out ONE time, years and years ago, because he was working a job and I checked with his boss who assured me he'd be welcome back if he could come in to work. I didn't get 'burned' on that, many months later when the case came to court, I was given a full refund of the bail I paid. Didn't stop him from continuing his destructive path. I have never bailed him out again, nor have I visited him while he's been in. Not any of the umpteen times. A few weeks ago, he was sentenced on 3 (more) felony (drug) charges and now faces 5 years in Prison. Breathe. Pray. Repeat. So....it used to be the worst thing I could ever imagine that my son would go to Prison. Today, the thought is..."Well, the State has better programs to offer than the County." (Oy!) I think the point I finally came to is: It's out of my hands. HE's the one getting arrested. HE's the one breaking the law. It's not about ME anymore. We all know that doesn't end when they hit the magical age of 18, but as that was 13 years ago now, I've got some distance from the whole "rotten mother" syndrome. This is about HIM now. I love him to pieces, he's my favorite person in the whole world. And he knows that. He also knows, don't ask me for money ;) Gentle Hugs to you ~ and Peace [/QUOTE]
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Please help with our decision to bail 36 yr old son out of jail..
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