Please keep Dude in your prayers
- Thread starter Star*
- Start date
DDD
Well-Known Member
Unlike many family members I don't think you should do anything. Your life has finally settled down and you have disengaged from the choices he has made and the results of those choices. You and DF don't live in the same community and he no longer shares your environment. I am truly sorry to hear what happened but as tempting as it may be to fight for justice...I think your health and peace of mind are paramount. Hugs. DDD
donna723
Well-Known Member
More hugs and prayers going out for Dude. Poor kid just can't catch a break!
I think contacting the media is a wonderful idea! Most newspapers and TV stations have investigative reporters who LOVE to get hold of something like that! It really does sound like the kid has some connections that got him off easy. If you have the name of the officer who worked the "accident", you can also file a formal complaint against him and how the case was handled. That goes right to the top and is pretty hard to ignore.
I think contacting the media is a wonderful idea! Most newspapers and TV stations have investigative reporters who LOVE to get hold of something like that! It really does sound like the kid has some connections that got him off easy. If you have the name of the officer who worked the "accident", you can also file a formal complaint against him and how the case was handled. That goes right to the top and is pretty hard to ignore.
Star--
We are all outraged and brainstorming things to do to fix this problem and get justice for Dude...but before we invest a lot of time, effort and money...
Is there any chance that we are hearing a "difficult child Version" of this story?
Ya know - I was just innocently riding my bike and this maniac ran me over and almost killed some pedestrians and then hit a parked car and meanhile, my friends (who just happened to be there where I was riding my bike) were able to chase this guy down...
and THEN the cops said there was nothing they could do and the kid just went home.
Is it possible that there was an altercation of some sort - groups of young people talking smack back and forth, making threats, calling names, egging each other on - and things got out of hand? Somebody got in his car - the crowd wasn't letting him pass - he hit Dude on his bike, nearly ran over other people who were in his way out in the street...
In which case, I could see the ticket instead of a more serious charge...
AND the officers might have issued warnings all around...
Just something to think about...
We are all outraged and brainstorming things to do to fix this problem and get justice for Dude...but before we invest a lot of time, effort and money...
Is there any chance that we are hearing a "difficult child Version" of this story?
Ya know - I was just innocently riding my bike and this maniac ran me over and almost killed some pedestrians and then hit a parked car and meanhile, my friends (who just happened to be there where I was riding my bike) were able to chase this guy down...
and THEN the cops said there was nothing they could do and the kid just went home.
Is it possible that there was an altercation of some sort - groups of young people talking smack back and forth, making threats, calling names, egging each other on - and things got out of hand? Somebody got in his car - the crowd wasn't letting him pass - he hit Dude on his bike, nearly ran over other people who were in his way out in the street...
In which case, I could see the ticket instead of a more serious charge...
AND the officers might have issued warnings all around...
Just something to think about...
Star*
call 911........call 911
As far as getting involved? Yeah - well - there again voice of wisdom DF as many of you says - This is again, not our plight. He's a big boy, wanted to live in the big world, and is doing the same...Let him. We advised get phone book, call personal injury attorney or two, go see them, and let them handle it - that's what they're getting paid for. Not us.
Had there been injuries? We of course, would have gone to the hospital. However thankfully - he was not.
As far as what is true? It's anyones guess, but ya'll do bring up some good points we had considered too. Again this is why we said we're backing off and just letting his attorney handle it all. We're sure there are cameras, and witnesses and things like that. If there is a relative LEO or friend there? He's in for a big surprise, Dude has LEO relatives and friends too they just didn't know about it, but now they do. I'm sure it will all get worked out and investigated.
I'm just so glad I don't live there anymore. The admission the to the Magic Kingdom is ridiculous - Know what I mean??
Had there been injuries? We of course, would have gone to the hospital. However thankfully - he was not.
As far as what is true? It's anyones guess, but ya'll do bring up some good points we had considered too. Again this is why we said we're backing off and just letting his attorney handle it all. We're sure there are cameras, and witnesses and things like that. If there is a relative LEO or friend there? He's in for a big surprise, Dude has LEO relatives and friends too they just didn't know about it, but now they do. I'm sure it will all get worked out and investigated.
I'm just so glad I don't live there anymore. The admission the to the Magic Kingdom is ridiculous - Know what I mean??
Star*
call 911........call 911
I don't have yer guts, but I can take your advice. Thanks.
I did get the Paul Harvey version today, and I still advised to call an attorney, and I am still not getting involved. We had that feeling there was more to the story, and there is a little bit more, Dude really isn't in trouble, and he should seek an attorney in this case believe it or not someone elses kid is actually a complete moron , but again - not my deal.
I vaaaaaaant to be aloneeeeeeeee.
I did get the Paul Harvey version today, and I still advised to call an attorney, and I am still not getting involved. We had that feeling there was more to the story, and there is a little bit more, Dude really isn't in trouble, and he should seek an attorney in this case believe it or not someone elses kid is actually a complete moron , but again - not my deal.
I vaaaaaaant to be aloneeeeeeeee.
FlowerGarden
Active Member
Sorry to hear about what happened. Hope he is OK.
Star*
call 911........call 911
as Paul Harvey says - the rest of the story.
Well there wasn't any pre-banter but there was additional information. (Good Detective work DF)
Story goes -
Dude and buddies were riding in bike lane at the beach. Kid in car rides up with his buddies in car and swerves on purpose whooping and hollering, didn't mean to hit Dude - but did - then didn't stop - took off. Dude's friends raced on bikes after the driver. Driver obviously knew he was in trouble and took off, but got stopped by beach traffic. Buddies threaten guys in car, and it gets heated. Dude comes up a minute or two later and asks driver "WTH?" Driver laughs, saying he was just kidding, but before he could say anything else - Dude tells him to get out of his car and driver refuses, still laughing. Drivers friends start to get out, Dudes friends keep them in the car - Driver still refuses to get out so Dude pounds windshield, tells driver to get out, driver starts to get out and thinks better of it and Dude beats windshield 4 more times. Starts to leave saying more ugly things - and driver actually uses his car to HIT Dude, and Dude rolls up on the guys car, hits the windshield and rolls off on the side and onto the road. Dude's friends pick Dude up, the bike and witnesses see this happen - kid freaks out - hits the gas - takes off and skids into 2 parked cars. Witness in crosswalk see Dude roll off car, see kid hit parked cars and at this point police are seeing this - and all they see is kid hit last parked car that takes off.
Police pull car over - Dude is worried he's in trouble for punching windhsield - cop figures it's a he said, he said situation - despite witnesses saying kid hit Dude? Dude says nothing...still afraid about windshield, and Dude says What if he hit me with his car AFTER all the tickets were written - Cop said you don't have much of a case NOW....and that's what the LEO was talking about.
Dude does (we think) have an outstanding warrant out for himself for failure to complete probation. He tried to turn himself in to the police where he was and they said they can't arrest him there for something he did here. So.....if he does go after this kid for running him over - and I hope he does - maybe he can earn enough money to get an attorney to help him with the problems he created for himself here. The things that stuck out to me were if he did get an attorney there - tell them he has problems here, and let them know everything that happened as it happened. Even the window punching - etc. Dude's friends seem to be more upset about it than he is. He's more upset that his bike is wrecked and the one thing he really liked to do - ride competetively - is done. He was really trying to use that to keep himself out of trouble and busy.
He said even when he tries to be good - everthing comes out of the woodwork to get him. I said "YUP that's the way it seems some days, and then other days? You have really good days that make up for those bad ones." Whatever happens? It's not my concern - but I am glad to hear there was more to the story and he was able to eventually let me know - I'm not happy he wasn't able to confide it all upfront - but a day later is better than never. Baby steps I guess. Ugh.
Makes not getting involved all the more worthwhile.......thanks for the good advice.
Well there wasn't any pre-banter but there was additional information. (Good Detective work DF)
Story goes -
Dude and buddies were riding in bike lane at the beach. Kid in car rides up with his buddies in car and swerves on purpose whooping and hollering, didn't mean to hit Dude - but did - then didn't stop - took off. Dude's friends raced on bikes after the driver. Driver obviously knew he was in trouble and took off, but got stopped by beach traffic. Buddies threaten guys in car, and it gets heated. Dude comes up a minute or two later and asks driver "WTH?" Driver laughs, saying he was just kidding, but before he could say anything else - Dude tells him to get out of his car and driver refuses, still laughing. Drivers friends start to get out, Dudes friends keep them in the car - Driver still refuses to get out so Dude pounds windshield, tells driver to get out, driver starts to get out and thinks better of it and Dude beats windshield 4 more times. Starts to leave saying more ugly things - and driver actually uses his car to HIT Dude, and Dude rolls up on the guys car, hits the windshield and rolls off on the side and onto the road. Dude's friends pick Dude up, the bike and witnesses see this happen - kid freaks out - hits the gas - takes off and skids into 2 parked cars. Witness in crosswalk see Dude roll off car, see kid hit parked cars and at this point police are seeing this - and all they see is kid hit last parked car that takes off.
Police pull car over - Dude is worried he's in trouble for punching windhsield - cop figures it's a he said, he said situation - despite witnesses saying kid hit Dude? Dude says nothing...still afraid about windshield, and Dude says What if he hit me with his car AFTER all the tickets were written - Cop said you don't have much of a case NOW....and that's what the LEO was talking about.
Dude does (we think) have an outstanding warrant out for himself for failure to complete probation. He tried to turn himself in to the police where he was and they said they can't arrest him there for something he did here. So.....if he does go after this kid for running him over - and I hope he does - maybe he can earn enough money to get an attorney to help him with the problems he created for himself here. The things that stuck out to me were if he did get an attorney there - tell them he has problems here, and let them know everything that happened as it happened. Even the window punching - etc. Dude's friends seem to be more upset about it than he is. He's more upset that his bike is wrecked and the one thing he really liked to do - ride competetively - is done. He was really trying to use that to keep himself out of trouble and busy.
He said even when he tries to be good - everthing comes out of the woodwork to get him. I said "YUP that's the way it seems some days, and then other days? You have really good days that make up for those bad ones." Whatever happens? It's not my concern - but I am glad to hear there was more to the story and he was able to eventually let me know - I'm not happy he wasn't able to confide it all upfront - but a day later is better than never. Baby steps I guess. Ugh.
Makes not getting involved all the more worthwhile.......thanks for the good advice.
Star*
call 911........call 911
Someone - should send his Mother a cookie. Poor woman. lol
Well if nothing else as I told him after I got the strength of D3 and Daisy behind me and said "Sooooooo whats the rest of this story?" (thinking - now if the board gals were sitting behind me on a patio reunion scenario - and I didn't KNOW they were behind me per se - but Dude saw them - and he had to "Auntie" up the rest of the story - what would my tone be?
yeah I hit him with THAT Motherly tone and amazingly? He just said - Well, the whole story is .....And before he even got any of THAT version out, I said "Listen, Not that it's any of MY business, but since I'm not going to interfere anyway - please do me a solid and just tell me the whole truth so we can cut out the ****, and I can steer you to the best choices for you here, okay?" That's all I'm asking, I'm not going to tell you what to do, I'm just going to make a suggestion when you're done, and then I'm buttin' out, but I need all the facts so however much the WOW factor is - just lay it out cold will ya?."
And we went from there.
Seems that when I explain to him - I won't get involved, I just want to give him advice based on knowing all the facts? He seems to tell me the entire story - and then I really do butt out. I've learned so much from you gals here. And I have so fewer headaches because of it.
Just wanted to really say thanks for being flat out honest and not being afraid to say what you think - because had you not been brave enough to say "Well I think this or I think that, or had you considered this?" I may not have. It's truly an enjoyable thing to have friends with wisdom and sage advice that make you think about the other side - even if you really want to put on the rose colored glasses at times or go riding gun-ho into a situation you have no place being.
NOW - how about that cookie.....I smell brownies....DF is baking.....whatta man!
Well if nothing else as I told him after I got the strength of D3 and Daisy behind me and said "Sooooooo whats the rest of this story?" (thinking - now if the board gals were sitting behind me on a patio reunion scenario - and I didn't KNOW they were behind me per se - but Dude saw them - and he had to "Auntie" up the rest of the story - what would my tone be?
yeah I hit him with THAT Motherly tone and amazingly? He just said - Well, the whole story is .....And before he even got any of THAT version out, I said "Listen, Not that it's any of MY business, but since I'm not going to interfere anyway - please do me a solid and just tell me the whole truth so we can cut out the ****, and I can steer you to the best choices for you here, okay?" That's all I'm asking, I'm not going to tell you what to do, I'm just going to make a suggestion when you're done, and then I'm buttin' out, but I need all the facts so however much the WOW factor is - just lay it out cold will ya?."
And we went from there.
Seems that when I explain to him - I won't get involved, I just want to give him advice based on knowing all the facts? He seems to tell me the entire story - and then I really do butt out. I've learned so much from you gals here. And I have so fewer headaches because of it.
Just wanted to really say thanks for being flat out honest and not being afraid to say what you think - because had you not been brave enough to say "Well I think this or I think that, or had you considered this?" I may not have. It's truly an enjoyable thing to have friends with wisdom and sage advice that make you think about the other side - even if you really want to put on the rose colored glasses at times or go riding gun-ho into a situation you have no place being.
NOW - how about that cookie.....I smell brownies....DF is baking.....whatta man!
H
HaoZi
Guest
"Auntie" up - love it!
*passes out some girl scout cookies she still has*
*passes out some girl scout cookies she still has*
rejectedmom
New Member
comming in late but glad Dude is OK. Always more to the story than firts appears when dealing with a difficult child. I'm glad you eventually got the whole scoop and also stayed out of the fray.
N
Nomad
Guest
Wow...what a mixture of concerns.
I read fast and only a few responses...but I agree, maybe the kid that hit your son has connections.
However, the fact that your son has been hit so many times defies the law of averages and that is a red flag.
Hope whatever the missing factor (s) is/are are determined and addressed honestly and appropriately and that your son heals quickly and GLAD that you stayed out of it....avoided getting involved, etc.
I read fast and only a few responses...but I agree, maybe the kid that hit your son has connections.
However, the fact that your son has been hit so many times defies the law of averages and that is a red flag.
Hope whatever the missing factor (s) is/are are determined and addressed honestly and appropriately and that your son heals quickly and GLAD that you stayed out of it....avoided getting involved, etc.
Similar threads
