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Please respond - Mother in Guatemala
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<blockquote data-quote="KFld" data-source="post: 57914" data-attributes="member: 2442"><p>Your son is treating you the same as many of the children on this board have treated there mother/parents. This is probably the last thing you want to hear or expect us to tell you, but you have to detatch from him and give him nothing. You have to learn to do for yourself and allow him to do for himself. He is old enough and capable of getting a job and moving on with his own life, but chooses to do nothing and destroy yours. </p><p></p><p>The best thing for both of you would be for you and your fiance to move on and be happy and stop doing anything for him. He doesn't treat you with any kind of respect, so he deserves none from you. The only way he will learn to take care of himself is when you stop taking care of him. He will hate you for it at first, though it doesn't sound like he could possibly treat you any worse then he does now. Someday when he learns to be responsible he may come back and thank you for it. </p><p></p><p>You have to remember, you haven't done this to him. You have offered for him to get help and he refuses. You need to get a list of places he could go live, for example group homes, not sure what is available there, homeless shelters?? Tell him you are through supporting him and that he needs to get a job and support himself. If he refuses all of this, that is his choice. </p><p></p><p>There will be others along to give you help and support who have been through similar situations and most will probably tell you the same thing. </p><p></p><p>It's time for you to become strong and take over your life. </p><p></p><p>Welcome to our family. It's a wonderful place to be :smile:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="KFld, post: 57914, member: 2442"] Your son is treating you the same as many of the children on this board have treated there mother/parents. This is probably the last thing you want to hear or expect us to tell you, but you have to detatch from him and give him nothing. You have to learn to do for yourself and allow him to do for himself. He is old enough and capable of getting a job and moving on with his own life, but chooses to do nothing and destroy yours. The best thing for both of you would be for you and your fiance to move on and be happy and stop doing anything for him. He doesn't treat you with any kind of respect, so he deserves none from you. The only way he will learn to take care of himself is when you stop taking care of him. He will hate you for it at first, though it doesn't sound like he could possibly treat you any worse then he does now. Someday when he learns to be responsible he may come back and thank you for it. You have to remember, you haven't done this to him. You have offered for him to get help and he refuses. You need to get a list of places he could go live, for example group homes, not sure what is available there, homeless shelters?? Tell him you are through supporting him and that he needs to get a job and support himself. If he refuses all of this, that is his choice. There will be others along to give you help and support who have been through similar situations and most will probably tell you the same thing. It's time for you to become strong and take over your life. Welcome to our family. It's a wonderful place to be [img]:smile:[/img] [/QUOTE]
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