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PLEASE someone be online...this is LONG
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 67084" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I'd like to add again that, although some would battle this, I don't really think that what a child is doing NOW is indicative of how they will be as a teenager. in my opinion no child decides to be "bad" and in my opinion they become uncontrollable only because they are out of control. If he has bipolar disorder (which I have) right now he's not yet stable and is liekly not very able to comply yet, but that could change with the right medications/treatment. Once he is stable, most likely he/she will listen and be able to comply. That's why I wouldn't work myself into a nervous breakdown over it. If the child isn't stable when he is a teen, no, he won't listen then either, but if he is, he'll be easier to control. If it's bipolar, it's not a discipline problem, it's a medical psychiatric disorder that needs MEDICAL treatment. Decide whether or not you want to fight with the child until you "win" and with these unstable kids, often neither of you win and the kid feels horrible for his rage and you, as a parent, feel like a failure because the child made YOU give in. I wouldn't set myself up for that right now. I'd lay off the room.</p><p>I *do* believe in "The Explosive Child." It's not a cure all for long term. It is in my opinion supposed to be used until the child's disorder is treated so that you can have peace in your life. I remember homework wars that went nowhere except to upset both the child and the rest of the family. in my opinion it's not worth it. You aren't letting him "get away" with everything by putting this on hold until he is stable or until YOU are healthy enough to deal with it. One practical bit of advice in my opinion is to let her have her bed and dresser in her room and nothing else. Therefore she cant mess it up. Put her other stuff in storage and give it to her one at a time, then make her put it back. I don't think fighting 24/7 is healthy for anyone...or a good solution. One practical bit of advice Again, this is JMO. (((Hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 67084, member: 1550"] I'd like to add again that, although some would battle this, I don't really think that what a child is doing NOW is indicative of how they will be as a teenager. in my opinion no child decides to be "bad" and in my opinion they become uncontrollable only because they are out of control. If he has bipolar disorder (which I have) right now he's not yet stable and is liekly not very able to comply yet, but that could change with the right medications/treatment. Once he is stable, most likely he/she will listen and be able to comply. That's why I wouldn't work myself into a nervous breakdown over it. If the child isn't stable when he is a teen, no, he won't listen then either, but if he is, he'll be easier to control. If it's bipolar, it's not a discipline problem, it's a medical psychiatric disorder that needs MEDICAL treatment. Decide whether or not you want to fight with the child until you "win" and with these unstable kids, often neither of you win and the kid feels horrible for his rage and you, as a parent, feel like a failure because the child made YOU give in. I wouldn't set myself up for that right now. I'd lay off the room. I *do* believe in "The Explosive Child." It's not a cure all for long term. It is in my opinion supposed to be used until the child's disorder is treated so that you can have peace in your life. I remember homework wars that went nowhere except to upset both the child and the rest of the family. in my opinion it's not worth it. You aren't letting him "get away" with everything by putting this on hold until he is stable or until YOU are healthy enough to deal with it. One practical bit of advice in my opinion is to let her have her bed and dresser in her room and nothing else. Therefore she cant mess it up. Put her other stuff in storage and give it to her one at a time, then make her put it back. I don't think fighting 24/7 is healthy for anyone...or a good solution. One practical bit of advice Again, this is JMO. (((Hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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