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Potetial confrontation coming up
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<blockquote data-quote="HereWeGoAgain" data-source="post: 37372" data-attributes="member: 3485"><p>You all are right. I shouldn't be managing her money. I basically shielded her from consequences. And who knows, maybe she would have handled it responsibly on her own -- we can't know if we don't give her the chance. The proper thing to do would have been to hand her her W2s when she was here in between the hospital and the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and say "I'm not going to deal with this for you."</p><p></p><p>That's what I should have done, but I didn't. I didn't practice what I preach.</p><p></p><p>So anyway, this morning the confrontation was renewed as predicted. I repeated the same arguments for paying the fine and she kept up the "it's my money and I need it for expenses" line. My retort was that the fine is one of her expenses too and it wouldn't go away just because she had other priorities. So when she got on the train it was still a standoff.</p><p></p><p>wife called after court and told me the rest of the story. J was in tears getting off of the train. She had thought it over and decided that we were right, she should pay the fine, and she was remorseful about the things she'd said to me. When her case was called she volunteered to pay off the whole fine. The judge said that the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) would suffice for the other requirement of her court supervision plan, that she get substance abuse counseling. So as long as she stays in the program all her legal problems are cleared up.</p><p></p><p>This shows a level of maturity that we haven't seen for a long, long time and is very encouraging. And I'm going to take you all's advice and turn the rest of the money over.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="HereWeGoAgain, post: 37372, member: 3485"] You all are right. I shouldn't be managing her money. I basically shielded her from consequences. And who knows, maybe she would have handled it responsibly on her own -- we can't know if we don't give her the chance. The proper thing to do would have been to hand her her W2s when she was here in between the hospital and the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and say "I'm not going to deal with this for you." That's what I should have done, but I didn't. I didn't practice what I preach. So anyway, this morning the confrontation was renewed as predicted. I repeated the same arguments for paying the fine and she kept up the "it's my money and I need it for expenses" line. My retort was that the fine is one of her expenses too and it wouldn't go away just because she had other priorities. So when she got on the train it was still a standoff. wife called after court and told me the rest of the story. J was in tears getting off of the train. She had thought it over and decided that we were right, she should pay the fine, and she was remorseful about the things she'd said to me. When her case was called she volunteered to pay off the whole fine. The judge said that the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) would suffice for the other requirement of her court supervision plan, that she get substance abuse counseling. So as long as she stays in the program all her legal problems are cleared up. This shows a level of maturity that we haven't seen for a long, long time and is very encouraging. And I'm going to take you all's advice and turn the rest of the money over. [/QUOTE]
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