Power of the Board Needed Desperately!!

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
First I need to provide a bit of history.......

Nichole has a friend "D" she has known for years. D is a difficult child diagnosed with bipolar and I strongly suspect Borderline (BPD) due to a pretty severe abusive / neglectful home environment growing up. During her teen years D was as unstable as Nichole, in and out of psychiatric hospital ect, refused to take her medications...... At 17 she got pregnant and left home. She moved in the the baby's father who was abusive. She was a good Mom to the baby girl she adored, doted on her ect. She stabilized somewhat in the absence of her family despite the abusive boyfriend.

Then at about 9 months her daughter died of SIDS. Upon finding her infant daughter dead in the crib, D totally freaked. She wrapped her up and put her in the trash and tried to commit suicide....... (while she was pregnant her Mom consistantly told her she'd kill the baby because she was too incompetent to care for her properly) Coroner did an extensive investigation to rule out other possible causes especially due to D's unstable mental and emotional background. He found nothing. D had to be hospitalized several times following the death of her baby. All the while her family refused to believe the coroners report and constantly accused her of killing her child. And you can guess that messed with her head pretty bad.

Time passed. D met a guy she thought was truly wonderful. They got married. She got pregnant again. The baby boy has been thriving and D was on top of the world. Then the baby who was about 3 months old got sick. D panicked and took him to the ER. Baby was dehydrated so they went to put in an IV which is placed in the scalp of an infant that age. D totally lost it in the ER. No doubt terrified he was going to die like her daughter. Staff reacted badly (to put it nicely) making her state of mind even worse and she wound up admitted to the psychiatric unit. Baby's dad had to be called back from Iraq to take custody. I counseled her to get a good lawyer because DFS was going to remove the baby from the home if she was discharge and went back home. Good lawyer did get it cleared up after a rather long investigation which of course only drug back up all that horrid pain over the loss of her baby daughter.......which really hadn't been that long ago. Plus her husband's family went off the deep end and started trying to convince him she was "nuts" and going to kill their son like she did the baby girl (which she didn't) .......her own family has started in on her again..........her husband has left her and is messing with her head in a big way trying to cause her to dive off the deep end again so he can get custody.

Yes. It's a mess. :whiteflag:

D is a good kid. From what I've seen she's an excellent Mom who adores her baby boy and adored her daughter. I know she didn't kill her daughter and I know she's never done anything to her son. I was the one who told her to take him to the ER that he was probably dehydrated and needed to be seen........because she'd come to me for help........and yeah all this junk started.

She is not stable at the moment by a long shot with good reason......she has too many people, the very people who should be helping her and supporting her, messing with her head and making it all so much worse. She's terrified of losing her son. And yet because nothing has ever worked in this girl's favor.........she's all but given up hopes of keeping him. Which has sent her spiraling.

So please, I ask with all my heart that we bring out the Power of the Board for D. Pray that she goes for help, starts taking her medications again. I'm so afraid we're going to lose her over this. This poor girl has never had anyone on her side except Nichole and me and her husband.......until his family turned him against her. Her suicide attempts are not for attention. It's been by the grace of God she was saved in the past.:(:(

Thank you.
 

nvts

Active Member
My prayers are with D, the son, and the father - this has got to be an incredibly confusing time for him as well. God Bless all of them, I'm rattling beads here!

Beth
 
D

dudley24

Guest
After I have a good cry I will definitely light a candle and send some healing energy her way...My prayers are on the way.
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Thank you all so much for the prayers / good thoughts.

I spoke with D last night. She is so unstable it's frightening. The people around her have her convinced it's all her fault, they've really been badgering her non stop. She is walking that fine line right now..........and is too far (several states away) for either Nichole or I to physically go help her. I attempted to calm and reason with her but we all know that you never are sure how much of that soaks in with a spiraling difficult child. Please keep the prayers / good thoughts coming.

Hugs
 

AnnieO

Shooting from the Hip
Adding my prayers to the mix...

I missed something... When did her and her husband split???? Is it because of what his family has been telling him????
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Yeah, step..........they've convinced him she's so insane she's going to kill their baby. Which is so far from the truth it is ridiculous. But they never liked her from the start, so I'm guessing they're using this as a means to split them up for good.

Nichole talked to D this morning. She seems to be in a better place. She's made an appointment with a psychiatrist and plans to go back into treatment and get back on her medications, get a job ect. So maybe, just maybe she listened to what we've been telling her. And I'm sure the prayers here are helping her.

D is a difficult child, no doubt about it. Actually one of the reasons I'm so fond of her is that she and Nichole are so alike in many ways. She really is a good kid with an enormous heart who is doing the best she can to just have a "normal" life.......something she only saw when she came here for sleep overs. Her own family dynamics were........well........Let's put it this way, Mom only took her to psychiatrist to have her treated because she was forced into it via the school DFS ect.......Her Mom buys into the old school stereotypical garbage about mental illness.........and honestly has done some serious damage to D by telling her she'll never be normal, she's just a nut job who can't function........and I so could go on but you get the idea. Mom's attitude directed the rest of the family's attitude. Mom would've preferred D have been locked away in a basement rather than anyone knowing she had a crazy daughter.

Sadly it seems her husband's family seem to have similar feelings.......

This is not helping a girl who is already struggling to remain stable under awful (at best) circumstances. And is not helping when Nichole and I are talking to her and trying to get her back into treatment. (she always drops out because she's so afraid of others finding out)

I'm really hoping she makes it to that psychiatrist appointment but will be holding my breath until she does.
 
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