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Prison visit with difficult child 1 didn't go well
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 631765" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Tish, I am so sorry. Thank you for posting. You and husband sound like very healthy people, and people who get it, and who are still warm and hopeful and want to help, in the right way and at the right time. I am sure you have worked very very hard to get to where you are today. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Having said the above, there is no way to ever be fully ready for what you experienced at the prison with difficult child. I don't care how well put together and recovered you are.</p><p></p><p>That is why we have to keep coming back. We never really "get there."</p><p></p><p>But I believe you and husband are well on the way to "there." Your post sounds solid and reasoned and intelligent and aware and also hopeful and kind and giving. </p><p></p><p>I just am so sorry. In a very controlled environment, like your difficult child is in today, the fact that he is cycling back and forth is shattering. I just reread your post and didn't know whether or not he is still on the medications in jail or not. Was he taking the medications when you had this visit?</p><p></p><p>It so horribly sad when THERE IS A SOLUTION----like medications----and difficult child won't do it. So deeply frustrating. </p><p></p><p>What can you do, Tish? Truly?</p><p></p><p>Just detach and love him from a distance, I believe. What else is there? Until he gets ready to do what the professionals say and what has already been proven to help himself, there is nothing else to be done. </p><p></p><p>I know you love him and you have hope, which is always a very human reaction and comes from the best place in all of us. That also makes us so vulnerable.</p><p></p><p>Just know that we are with you here. My heart goes out to you and husband and I have learned from you, so please keep posting. </p><p></p><p>We all need each other.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 631765, member: 17542"] Tish, I am so sorry. Thank you for posting. You and husband sound like very healthy people, and people who get it, and who are still warm and hopeful and want to help, in the right way and at the right time. I am sure you have worked very very hard to get to where you are today. Having said the above, there is no way to ever be fully ready for what you experienced at the prison with difficult child. I don't care how well put together and recovered you are. That is why we have to keep coming back. We never really "get there." But I believe you and husband are well on the way to "there." Your post sounds solid and reasoned and intelligent and aware and also hopeful and kind and giving. I just am so sorry. In a very controlled environment, like your difficult child is in today, the fact that he is cycling back and forth is shattering. I just reread your post and didn't know whether or not he is still on the medications in jail or not. Was he taking the medications when you had this visit? It so horribly sad when THERE IS A SOLUTION----like medications----and difficult child won't do it. So deeply frustrating. What can you do, Tish? Truly? Just detach and love him from a distance, I believe. What else is there? Until he gets ready to do what the professionals say and what has already been proven to help himself, there is nothing else to be done. I know you love him and you have hope, which is always a very human reaction and comes from the best place in all of us. That also makes us so vulnerable. Just know that we are with you here. My heart goes out to you and husband and I have learned from you, so please keep posting. We all need each other. [/QUOTE]
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