Probably was just a matter of time....

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Hound dog, Nov 26, 2009.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I've emailed K 3-4 times and gotten no response. I haven't heard from her in at least 3 wks. When I told her I was sending halloween cards for the grands. I even finally sent her one via myspace......because there I can see if she read the darn thing. That one was 3 days ago. She's read it. Been online since and no response.

    I had hoped she'd want me to call to talk with the grands. I don't have the new number or else I'd have just called. sigh

    I dunno what's up. Even the last several emails have been brief and distant. I guess she didn't take that no one over here was going to rescue her again very well. On top of that I told her that due to her Dad being out of work each grandkid is getting one present this year. I asked her for things the kids would like to have and got a whatever in response.

    It's looking like she's not so thrilled with us since it's clearly evident we have no plans to help financially support her and the kids. She hasn't emailed the other kids either in ages.

    While it hurts to see that she really hasn't changed that much over the years........I am at least thankful for getting to know the grands again. That was a gift I never thought I'd get. And Nichole got closure on the whole K abandonment issue.

    If she wants to distance herself again I can't do anything about it. I will continue to do my best to be a grandma to the long as she lets me. I can't do much else.

    I guess some difficult child's never stop being difficult children.:(
  2. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    I'm sorry, Lisa. :(

    I know you were guarded with K, but just thrilled to be in the grands lives.

  3. ML

    ML Guest

    Lisa, I'm so sorry. I just hope she allows you to have contact with the grands. You did the right thing by the way. I know your heart is hurting. Please be extra nice to yourself today. Love, ML
  4. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE


    Even though it's probably not terribly surprising, it has to be disappointing.

    I'm sorry, Lisa.

  5. aninom

    aninom New Member

    Hi Daisy,

    I know how much it hurts when year after year goes by and nothing seems to change, that disappointment. But it sounds like you've at least made some progress. One takes what one can get, right? Remember it's not down to you, it's down to HER - there's nothing to do, so why waste energy worrying over a situation you ultimately have little control over? Don't do that to yourself!

    My difficult child (sister) is the same way: she can't get anything from you? You said something which implied her not being a bundle of sunshine? You cease to exist. Just like that.

    But it always passes, if only when she needs something again, and not always money either (by the way, congrats on refusing to financially enable your difficult child anymore! we still haven't gotten anywhere near that point, and it needs to be done) - next time she will need to vent, next time something comes up in her life she actually doesn't know how to handle? Mom is the first person she goes to, regardless of how cold her communications had been previously. I guess what I'm trying to say is that she - your difficult child - probably won't be cold forever, and whenever she thaws that little bit, there is always the hope of a tiny, tiny step towards improvement.

    If nothing else, thank god chocolate milk exists! Hugs to you.
  6. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry that she has returned to some old tricks. I hope that she will get over it soon.
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    All I can say is buggers.