tryingtobestrong
Active Member
So, I think I wrote that my son left his sober living and IOP 4 weeks ago. Got his own place and was living alone. I was so angry and disgusted that I decided that I would not reach out to him so it was 3 weeks and then he sent me a text saying he didn't want to let us down anymore, that he was trying really hard...
I didn't reply because I had no clue what to say. He then called and said he relapsed. Talked about calling sober living places the following day but didn't want to lose all of the money he put out for his new place,etc. I really feel he was trying to see if I would say that we would take care of it if he went to sober living but I did not.
The following day he changed to he was just going to take antabuse in addition to his vivitrol shot and then he said he would talk to a recovery coach. I text him about that and got no reply
Today I got a text that he thinks he had a seizure and could I call him so I did. I could tell he was somewhat intoxicated. He said he couldn't stop drinking, hadn't gone to work all week, he wanted to die, etc. I said he should get into detox, etc and he just wouldn't grasp it. I called one of my contacts about detox and he had his person reach out to my son. They spoke and he agreed to go to detox... Well then he wouldn't answer the phone when the intake person tried to call him.... he wouldn't answer the guys calls either.... 5 hours later he calls me and said he fell asleep... same excuse he had a few months ago when he was to go to detox.
He said I have some favors for you to do... I was like well I am not paying your rent... I got but I lost my wallet and the rent is due today. I searched my apartment for hours.. funny he just said he fell asleep and just woke up... He said that they only accept online payments. I said well... then call the bank and get your info and do it yourself. I got that he will pay me back and ... I said Nope, I will not do it.
Then he wanted me to call a girl for him because she would no longer accept his calls because she didn't agree with how he was living his life... I said well we don't agree with it either and maybe he needs to change it- we can't do it for you. I then went off and it got quiet so I assumed he hung up so I did the same. He calls back and I said about him hanging up... I got "no I just put you on mute so I wouldn't have to listen to you" Like really? He is such an a**.
I feel nothing for him right now. I feel bad because I am his mother but I can't say I feel anything for him. I am sick of this.
I know I did the right thing. Was he telling the truth about losing his wallet? I don't know. He does seem to lose it a lot because he is drunk and has not a clue. I would assume the apartment would have a grace period for the rent like 2 days leeway but I am not certain.
With him wanting to pay the rent that shows he has no intention of going back to sober living like he mentioned. I am scared that maybe I will push him to do something to himself but we have paid for things before and it got us no where.
Sorry for venting.
I didn't reply because I had no clue what to say. He then called and said he relapsed. Talked about calling sober living places the following day but didn't want to lose all of the money he put out for his new place,etc. I really feel he was trying to see if I would say that we would take care of it if he went to sober living but I did not.
The following day he changed to he was just going to take antabuse in addition to his vivitrol shot and then he said he would talk to a recovery coach. I text him about that and got no reply
Today I got a text that he thinks he had a seizure and could I call him so I did. I could tell he was somewhat intoxicated. He said he couldn't stop drinking, hadn't gone to work all week, he wanted to die, etc. I said he should get into detox, etc and he just wouldn't grasp it. I called one of my contacts about detox and he had his person reach out to my son. They spoke and he agreed to go to detox... Well then he wouldn't answer the phone when the intake person tried to call him.... he wouldn't answer the guys calls either.... 5 hours later he calls me and said he fell asleep... same excuse he had a few months ago when he was to go to detox.
He said I have some favors for you to do... I was like well I am not paying your rent... I got but I lost my wallet and the rent is due today. I searched my apartment for hours.. funny he just said he fell asleep and just woke up... He said that they only accept online payments. I said well... then call the bank and get your info and do it yourself. I got that he will pay me back and ... I said Nope, I will not do it.
Then he wanted me to call a girl for him because she would no longer accept his calls because she didn't agree with how he was living his life... I said well we don't agree with it either and maybe he needs to change it- we can't do it for you. I then went off and it got quiet so I assumed he hung up so I did the same. He calls back and I said about him hanging up... I got "no I just put you on mute so I wouldn't have to listen to you" Like really? He is such an a**.
I feel nothing for him right now. I feel bad because I am his mother but I can't say I feel anything for him. I am sick of this.
I know I did the right thing. Was he telling the truth about losing his wallet? I don't know. He does seem to lose it a lot because he is drunk and has not a clue. I would assume the apartment would have a grace period for the rent like 2 days leeway but I am not certain.
With him wanting to pay the rent that shows he has no intention of going back to sober living like he mentioned. I am scared that maybe I will push him to do something to himself but we have paid for things before and it got us no where.
Sorry for venting.