Question about AA Meeting

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by bby31288, Oct 22, 2010.

  1. bby31288

    bby31288 Active Member

    My husband is considering taking in an AA meeting....I'm hoping he does, but while he is considering I want to start som Al-Anon meetings. Our local paper posts meetings for both. My question is, they are open and closed meetings. How does one get to the point of being able to go to a "closed" meeting? Is there a certain number of open meetings you have to go to before you can go to a closed meeting? I don't want to go to the wrong meeting...
  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    If he is just exploring what AA is like, an open meeting is probabl;y best. If you want to go with him and you are not in need of AA yourself, definitely an open meeting. If he has a desire to stop drinking, goes alone or with another AA member, it is fine for him to go to a closed meeting. He doesn't have to have made the "commitment" to it yet, but should be a little furhter along than contemplating whether or not he has a problem and wants to do something about it.
  3. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    The way my difficult child explained it to me is that I can go to an open meeting with her but closed meetings are only for the alcoholic. She took her friend to a meeting and didn't realize it was closed so her friend stayed out in the car. She can go to open or closed meetings, it just depends on day and time available.

    As far as I know all al-anon meetings are open, anyone can attend as long as you have a loved one who has an alcohol problem.

  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Nancy is right. Closed AA meetings are only for alcoholics, but alcoholics don't have to have gone to open meetings before they can go to closed ones. Closed al anon meetings are only for those who have an alcoholic in their lives. No one will interrogate you about who that person is.

    I can remember being totally shocked and horrified when my mother tried to interrogate my husband about who the alcoholic in his life was when husband was going to an alanon meeting. That is part of the anonymous - no one asks those questions!!!

    I hope that your husband learns a lot and is able to attend meetings often. They can really transform you life in wonderful ways. I hope the same is true for you in alanon meetings!
  5. bby31288

    bby31288 Active Member

    Thank you all for the information. I wasn't sure where to post the question. I am hoping my husband has a desire to go too. But either way, I can support and learn for myself...I think that time has come. Again, thanks for the info and support!
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Reminds me ... I haven't been to an Al-Anon mtng in 3 mo's. Want to go back.
    And I keep telling people I'm going to an AA mtng. They get these shocked looks. Heh heh.
    I wondered this the first time I went, as well. And also, what you would need a sponsor for.
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Terry you don't need a sponsor for al-anon. You need one in AA. I am learning that the sponsor plays in key role. Most sponsors expect a call every day checking in. If they don't hear from you they will call you. The sponsor is there to help when you have urges to drink/use. He/she helps you work on the steps of your program. The sponsor will go to meetings with you and hold you responsible for your sobriety. It is a big decision because you want someone you can click with. At our family meeting last week a member was saying he almost feels married to his sponsor (lol in a very plavtonic way of course).