Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Questioning self
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 674386" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>I think we all go down this road SP,<em> I know I do</em>. There are times when I start examining everything, trying to find rationale for this mess. The thing is, my girls started acting out around middle school. I have tons of photo albums with happy times and smiling faces. The trouble really began when they chose the wrong friends, started smoking pot, and eventually moved on to other substances. We could not be there for them 24/7, they had to learn to make good choices.</p><p></p><p> I agree.</p><p></p><p> I feel the same with my two d c's. It is because of all of the history we have, Comes a point, when it is hard to believe anything. This is not our fault. It is a part of the paths our d cs have been on.</p><p>For me, this is a consequence of the many times I have bent over backwards to help, been lied to and manipulated by an unappreciative d c.</p><p>They would have me believe it is all my fault, it keeps us enabling, the guilt. Guilt becomes an ace for our d cs, and they will throw that card down every chance they get.</p><p> I agree completely. This takes its toll on us. Never did we think that things would be this way.</p><p> I think you are being way too hard on yourself SP.</p><p> Again, you are being way to hard on yourself.</p><p>But,this is understandable, it is a part of the process of grieving over our d cs. It is called bargaining. "If only I did this, or didn't do this....."</p><p> How is your relationship with your 13 year old? I have two d cs/ plus two gracious adult kids, one 14 year old, our relationship is wonderful. These kids tell me, "Mom, they just try to blame you for everything, so they can continue to do what they do."</p><p> I know this feeling.</p><p>It is horrible, but it is also a consequence of my daughters choices.</p><p> Definitely solid advice.</p><p> Me, too.</p><p> I believe this to be true.</p><p> Every one of us makes mistakes SP. Try to take some deep breaths and be very good to yourself. This is all so stressful and tiring. On top of it, caring for our families and younger children. It is huge. I hope you are able to relax, slow down and find the peace you are seeking.</p><p></p><p>I hope we all are.</p><p></p><p>Take care</p><p>(((HUGS)))</p><p>leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 674386, member: 19522"] I think we all go down this road SP,[I] I know I do[/I]. There are times when I start examining everything, trying to find rationale for this mess. The thing is, my girls started acting out around middle school. I have tons of photo albums with happy times and smiling faces. The trouble really began when they chose the wrong friends, started smoking pot, and eventually moved on to other substances. We could not be there for them 24/7, they had to learn to make good choices. I agree. I feel the same with my two d c's. It is because of all of the history we have, Comes a point, when it is hard to believe anything. This is not our fault. It is a part of the paths our d cs have been on. For me, this is a consequence of the many times I have bent over backwards to help, been lied to and manipulated by an unappreciative d c. They would have me believe it is all my fault, it keeps us enabling, the guilt. Guilt becomes an ace for our d cs, and they will throw that card down every chance they get. I agree completely. This takes its toll on us. Never did we think that things would be this way. I think you are being way too hard on yourself SP. Again, you are being way to hard on yourself. But,this is understandable, it is a part of the process of grieving over our d cs. It is called bargaining. "If only I did this, or didn't do this....." How is your relationship with your 13 year old? I have two d cs/ plus two gracious adult kids, one 14 year old, our relationship is wonderful. These kids tell me, "Mom, they just try to blame you for everything, so they can continue to do what they do." I know this feeling. It is horrible, but it is also a consequence of my daughters choices. Definitely solid advice. Me, too. I believe this to be true. Every one of us makes mistakes SP. Try to take some deep breaths and be very good to yourself. This is all so stressful and tiring. On top of it, caring for our families and younger children. It is huge. I hope you are able to relax, slow down and find the peace you are seeking. I hope we all are. Take care (((HUGS))) leafy [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Questioning self
Top