Quick, ladies - don't let me down.....

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
I need believable excuses as to why I don't have to head out in 10 below zero weather to attend wm's quarterly staffing. I have this staffing memorized - the only good thing is the donuts (which I don't need) & foster mum's company (the woman is a delight!).

A car not starting in this weather won't be believable - c'mon this is MN; everyone has jumper cables. :coldday:

The fact that my head feels as though Mt. St. Helen's is about to explode inside isn't going to fly either. Maybe, just maybe, explaining that I shouldn't be driving while taking narcotic pain killers might make a difference. :crazydriver:

Explaining that I lost my balance on the way out to the garage, fell , & my lips hit & froze to one of the poles on my bird feeder might be stretching things a bit - what do you think? :frozen:Either way, it's quite the picture.

Being honest & saying I've heard it all before - many many times :grey:, I'm out of ideas & that I'd really rather be home getting rest before kt gets home from school just isn't going to fly.

So, ladies - don't let me down. I want fun, but believable ideas from you. I need a good laugh this morning. :hairy:


 

Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Too bad you don't live in Wisconsin-at least here in Madison many of us don't have jumper cables! The car not starting idea would work here!

What about you have a fever and feel the flu coming on?
 

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
Okay, momof3, think I've got the jest - can't find the car keys. It's so simple it just may work! :salute:

Pamela, shoveling snow off the roof - my roof is too slanted; just kind of slides off. Good try! :thumbsup:

Sharon, might be able to pull off the flu - my immune system is trashed as it it. Hmmmmmmm:ill:

Or I could tough it out & go. It's so reminiscent of Sue's description of thank you's staffing - same stuff different quarter. I get sad each time; so much is invested in wm & he's not invested in himself. It's everyone else's fault & if he could live at home, or if he could go to mainstream school, or if he had a different foster home, or a different sister or a better pair of boots, or a new gameboy or a pet turtle or his own cell phone or a new bike, etc, etc, etc,

It's never about change & looking inward. I look at my son & wonder........
 

nvts

Active Member
Ummmm, alien abduction?

I'd go the throwing up and "green apple two-step". You're extreeeemely concerned of infecting others, so you're holed up with nyquil, a humidifier, warm blankets and herb tea to try and get through it. Although you felt it coming on yesterday, you really didn't think anything was going to come of it, but alas, at 2:23 thia a.m. it hit you full blown. Since it's almost the weekend, you really don't want to "spread the joy" to all of them and THEIR children, sick days being so few and far between for his dedicated staff.

But, in answer to you question, I never called in sick (lol)!

Beth

PS: Or, you "nether believet ta sthory adout sthickin yaw tung to a pole in fweething weadder"!

:frozen::tongue:

Beth
 

meowbunny

New Member
You were on your way, hit an ice patch, the car jumped a ditch and landed on a pond. The ice broke, the car sank and you drowned. Oh, and you're presently suffering from hypothermia and might have to have 3 toes removed due to frostbite. iF they come up with any new ideas they can call you at home.

Yup, they should buy that, dontchya think?
 

slsh

member since 1999
Pink eye and an odd looking rash on your arms that, interestingly, husband has also developed. Best I can come up with- on short notice and with no coffee. ;)

Seriously? Speaker phone, hon. Absolutely *no* reason for you to be heading out in ice and miserable temps. It really is a safety issue, Linda. You're temporarily not so spry and a fall would be a bad thing and just what you don't need.

Plus, I'm tellin' you - speaker phone is just soooo much fun!!! LOL.
 

crazymama30

Active Member
I am with slsh, speaker phone. I would just tell them you do not feel it is safe for you to be driving while you take narcotic pain killers, because for most people it is not!!! They need your input, not your body. Good luck
 

Steely

Active Member
The doors to your car are frozen shut!???
True story on my part. Ice melted into the jams and froze all of my doors shut - I could not get them open for hours. I poured hot water over them, and it froze them even worse............I had to wait for it to warm up. VERY interesting but believable story, excuse, and as always saga!!!!
 
F

flutterbee

Guest
WW - 2 words for you: hair dryer

Linda - After you fell and froze your tongue to the bird feeder, the dog came to your rescue and now his tongue is stuck to the bird feeder, too.

At least you'll have company.
 

mstang67chic

Going Green
Ohhhhhhhh..........you want FUN ideas. In that case, I'll let you borrow one from the history of my Aunt Pat. She's the one in our family that if something freaky could happen, it will happen to her. (And yes, this is a true story, although I'm not 100% sure of the undergarment involved.) (LOL intrigued yet?)

So one day, Aunt Pat was headed upstairs to change clothes. As she lives alone since my uncle passed, she was undressing as she went.
(This is the part where I've always been confused.) She was either in the process of unhooking her bra or taking off her hose. (I swear it was her bra, my mom swears it was hose so take it as you will) Either way, she got her thumb caught in the offending garmet, lost her balance and fell. Aside from a dislocated or sprained thumb and some soreness she was ok.

So yes, it is possible to get tangled in your underclothes, take a spill and dislocate your thumb in the process. It's so wild that they would HAVE to believe it.

I, too, vote for the speaker phone. It's easier on you and you can also make faces or gestures and no one is the wiser!
 

susiestar

Roll With It
Can't drive while taking narcotics is more than reason enough.

A simple, I cannot leave the house in this weather, doctor's orders. Should be enough. You can say Doctor SusieStar said so (well, I am a mom, and am constantly dispensing medications to my kids, doesn't that count for something? Doctor of Momliness??)

I vote for speakerphone.

hugs,

Susie
 

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
:yes::yourock:

Not a one of you let me down, excuse wise! This is such a delightful group of people - imagine if I didn't have tweedles I'd have never met you!

Antibiotic induced diarrhea - brilliant! Pink eye, frozen doors, lost keys! Almost makes speaker phone downright boring.

And having said that, I attended that meeting. I can't tell you much of what's been said - what struck me was the brilliant smile & hug I received from wm when I walked in the door. It was a true, from the heart smile & it was for me. :beautifulthing: wm sat by my side the entire mtg, accepted redirection from me & was appropriate though very nervous & fidgety.

I'm so glad I decided to attend - it was the best decision I could have made as a mom. It lifted my spirits to see that smile from my son.

by the way, I'm keeping a copy of these excuses. We have some truly wickedly brilliant minds on this board.
 
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