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<blockquote data-quote="RN0441" data-source="post: 744081" data-attributes="member: 15032"><p>Beta</p><p></p><p>I'm so glad that you have a counseling appointment set up and what a "God wink" that it is on his birthday when you will be filled with thoughts of him!</p><p></p><p>I am hoping you will learn to set boundaries with him for yourself and for him. You will also learn how to detach with love. That is what I learned.</p><p></p><p>In fact, when we sent our son away I can honestly say that I did not even like him. I loved him but I did not like him at all and I did not want to be around him. I asked my husband at that time to promise me that he would never live with us again. He did. It is hard to admit this.</p><p></p><p>But now here we are. He did complete a 13 month faith based program so he is much different and has grown up a lot but I still see things in him that I'm not crazy about. It is what it is. He is not that sweet, innocent little boy anymore. I do miss that little boy so, so much. We have to move forward with what we have don't we?</p><p></p><p>I do know that if it were not for my faith, which has strengthened during my son's addiction, that I think I would have completely lost myself to sadness and grief. I honestly don't know why anyone would even ATTEMPT to handle this without God's help when it is there if we just ask. I did not have a strong faith based childhood but enough that I knew what I needed to know and I'm thankful for that.</p><p></p><p>Do not write the end of the story with your oldest son. God's plan for him will prevail.</p><p></p><p>Tanya - we have tried very hard not to give our son too much. We do want to but thankfully we have learned that in the end that will not help him so we have learned to hold back. Sometimes it seems selfish to hold back but I know that is what we need to do so he can learn how to adult. </p><p></p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/staystrong.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":staystrong:" title="staystrong :staystrong:" data-shortname=":staystrong:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="RN0441, post: 744081, member: 15032"] Beta I'm so glad that you have a counseling appointment set up and what a "God wink" that it is on his birthday when you will be filled with thoughts of him! I am hoping you will learn to set boundaries with him for yourself and for him. You will also learn how to detach with love. That is what I learned. In fact, when we sent our son away I can honestly say that I did not even like him. I loved him but I did not like him at all and I did not want to be around him. I asked my husband at that time to promise me that he would never live with us again. He did. It is hard to admit this. But now here we are. He did complete a 13 month faith based program so he is much different and has grown up a lot but I still see things in him that I'm not crazy about. It is what it is. He is not that sweet, innocent little boy anymore. I do miss that little boy so, so much. We have to move forward with what we have don't we? I do know that if it were not for my faith, which has strengthened during my son's addiction, that I think I would have completely lost myself to sadness and grief. I honestly don't know why anyone would even ATTEMPT to handle this without God's help when it is there if we just ask. I did not have a strong faith based childhood but enough that I knew what I needed to know and I'm thankful for that. Do not write the end of the story with your oldest son. God's plan for him will prevail. Tanya - we have tried very hard not to give our son too much. We do want to but thankfully we have learned that in the end that will not help him so we have learned to hold back. Sometimes it seems selfish to hold back but I know that is what we need to do so he can learn how to adult. :staystrong: [/QUOTE]
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