Racism sucks

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
Argh! I'm so sorry!
That definitely sounds like something a difficult child would do. But clearly, it was repeated from somewhere. Is that "somewhere" home?
I hope that the ROTC knocks the kid down a few notches. Just explaining it isn't enough.
And I'd make the kid write a paper on it.
And give the kid suspension.

Yeah, racism is out there and luckily, so far, my worst fears for difficult child have not come to fruition. I was worried that white girls wouldn't date him. So far, he's been interested in girls of all colors and they in him.

I am suprised that Chicago is racist. I thought ... well, never mind. There's just no figuring these things out.

I am so proud of Eeyore for holding it in!
And so angry that not another person stood up and retorted. That's more than awful.
 

dstc_99

Well-Known Member
Sorry to hear this!

One of the reasons I was so glad to marry into the military is because they are so cultural. It is nothing to find all different races and religions married and intermingling. My kids have grown up familiar with all races and religions and they dont really see color. They acknowledge it and the fact that people of different colors often have different beliefs and cultural norms but they don't care other than to be concerned about respecting their beliefs. I on the other hand did not grow up in that culture and I am glad that I got out of a racist town and family without lasting damage.

On the other hand if I have to listen to one more soldier complain about the Military offering benefits to same sex couples I am going to scream. LOL Oh yeah that and gun control.
 

buddy

New Member
In Mpls there have been two high school incidents ....some kids hung a babydoll with brown skin ( rope around waist not neck, they had a story that wasn't to do with race but!of course others were horrified ....
And just last week a food fight turned into a huge fight, police were called, mace was used......turns out to be racial tension between the African American students and the Somali students. So sad.

Q has been called the n word, now he calls me that. (Along with a zillion other names)

I'm grateful that Q's new school is very mixed. Especially love that at least half the staff are non-white. His one on one is an older Black man and q gets a great role model.
Still I think like in the mpls school, any groups can be racist. The kids interviewed are scared. I wish we were beyond that.
 

ThreeShadows

Quid me anxia?
I'll never understand how husband and I have managed to raise three difficult children who make racist statements! Nbrs 1&2, who are part Native American, have anti black sentiments (they have a 1/2 sister who is black) and anti Mexican prejudices. Nbr 3 dislikes the Chinese and Mexicans. WTH? I think that their peer group is stronger than our family values.
 

Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
I'm so sorry Eeyore had to deal with this:( It makes me angry and sad.

I remember growing up and my dad teaching us that everyone was the same no matter what their skin color was. I remember he told us at one point the guys at work said something that he should be careful or his kids might end up marrying someone who wasn't white. Dad couldn't care less! We always laugh now because my husband is Hispanic and our kiddos are African American. So glad Dad (and Mom) brought us up as they did.
 

dstc_99

Well-Known Member
One thing that pisses me off more than anything is how common it is for music, tv ads, and hell just about everything to make everyday events racist or sexist or just plain wrong.

I mean honestly I am an adult and I am smart enough to filter when a commercial comes on that has innapropriate comments or images in it. On the other hand it is sad when you have to worry about what your kid is seeing or hearing every time you turn on the media. The use of the N word in music and the use of cuss words in music has gotten so prevelant. It is actually pretty sad. The saddest thing to me though is that even Disney movies are getting on board with the sly use of words and scenarios. I remember my jaw dropping when watching Shrek and he called Donkey an :censored2:. I wonder how many kids went to school and got in trouble for saying things about an :censored2:. After watching it I sat back and tried to think why that one comment was even necessary to the movie and the answer is simple...it wasnt. The stuff was thrown in to make it funny for the adults.

GUESS WHAT DISNEY.......WE WATCH YOUR MOVIES EXPECTING SOMETHING FUN FOR OUR KIDS!!!! WE DONT NEED A SEX JOKE OR A CUSS WORD THROWN IN TO MAKE IT FUN FOR THE PARENT.

Sorry i will get off my soapbox now. :sissyfight:
 

BusynMember

Well-Known Member
I'm from the Chicago area originally. The Chicago schools are one of the most segregated in the country with the most disparity.

Is there any part of the country...indeed the world...where there is not hate and racism? I want to live there!
 

HaoZi

CD Hall of Fame
Any update on what the punishment will entail? And really, that whole table needs some sensitivity training.
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
Just looking for an update. Please let us know.

Buddy, that's interesting about Mpls. I have read three books by Ali Hirsi Ayaan, and while she mostly writes about feminism and anti-Muslim sentiments, she also clearly illustrates the clan mentality in Somalia. I thought, boy, am I glad we're so pro-individual in the U.S. And then I thought, wait a minute, no we're not; that's what gangs are: Clans. And teenage cliques. And country clubs. And even bumper stickers about horses and dogs. It's just a matter of degree and topic.
Sigh.
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
Is there any part of the country...indeed the world...where there is not hate and racism? I want to live there

Read more: http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/f6/racism-sucks-52690/index2.html#ixzz2LexLT1y8
No.
Maybe some places are more free of racism, but... "us vs them" is a basic human survival instinct, and so we look for ways to define "us" and "them". Who do you trust? you can't trust everybody, so you categorize... It may be by economic status rather than skin color, for example, or how long you've lived "here" (oldtimers vs newbies), but all of it is still a form of discrimination.
 

JJJ

Active Member
One boy (A) was given 3 days suspension and a phone call home, the other boy (B) just got the phone call home. Eeyore was upset because he felt the child who was punished was less guilty than the one who was let off. Eeyore went to the asst principal and complained. She asked him to explain. Turns out Eeyore did not clarify that (A) had the same name as the boy who harassed him earlier in the year, but is, in fact, a different child. He also did not clarify that only (B) made the 'hate crime' remark. Eeyore thought it would be fair if both boys got a set of detentions because that is what he gets when his 'goofing around' crosses the line.

Asst principal asked my permission to have all 3 boys sit down together with her. Assuming no new info comes to light, she is going to guide the discussion and then giveboth boys the detentions (and nix the suspension).

The admin also tried to explain to the white boys what it might feel like to be one of a very few black kids and then have their friends make racial jokes. She also tried to explain 'white privilege' to Eeyore and why sometimes even nice people stick their feet in their mouth through ignorance.

In the past, when the school dealt with this issue, the kids would usually have all their friends call Eeyore a snitch and a crybaby. What made me happy was that boy (A) went to Eeyore and apologized. This was not something he was required to do. He told Eeyore that he never thought about it from Eeyore's point of view and that he likes Eeyore and wants to be friends.
 

tiredmommy

Well-Known Member
Wow! Assuming the meeting goes well, I don't think you could have asked for a better outcome. And Way To Go to Eeyore for advocating for himself!
 

buddy

New Member
That is really good. Really shows what we've said here many times. Common sense, teachable moments, etc. really can make a difference.

Bet you're really proud of Eeyore!
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
What made me happy was that boy (A) went to Eeyore and apologized. This was not something he was required to do. He told Eeyore that he never thought about it from Eeyore's point of view and that he likes Eeyore and wants to be friends.

Read more: http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/f6/racism-sucks-52690/index2.html#ixzz2LfOp7aFd
And next time... this is the kind of a kid who will speak up.
Which is why Eyeore needs some sort of "reward" ... for speaking up.
We change the world, one person at a time.
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
I saw a show on Oprah one time and it really took me aback and I really didnt think it made the race thing any better. It was all about the N word. It was why black people can call each other that and its all fine and dandy but if any other race says it, oh its racism. Personally I think we should stop using it all together unless we are talking about history. But then again I have another thought on the word. This one could be a bit controversial. The way rap stars are using it in songs to portray gangsters and hoods and people who are really bad...well then ANYONE who acts that way could be thought of as the N word. It doesnt have to be just a black person. It could be every person who is in a gang, shoots up dope, wears their pants down around their knees, sells drugs on the corner, etc.
 

BusynMember

Well-Known Member
My daughter, who is biracial, told me she doesn't like black boys and won't date them. She only hangs with whites too.

IC, I think racism exists everywhere on earth. If a country has mostly one race, they are more apt to mouth about acceptance because they don't actually live with those who are of other cultures...it's not always that easy. And if it's not race, it's religion.

My asian daughter trashes Mexicans (they live in a Mexican area). It's not like her. She is very openminded and liberal and is very pro-gay marriage. Jumper doesn't hate anyone based on race, but is intimidated by blacks, which I find sad. But her abusive ex-adoptive brother was a black boy so maybe that's why. My biological son refuses to date anyone who isn't white (and he wonders why his siblings aren't crazy about him...hah!). The son we adopted who is Chinese and left our family is very into being Chinese and I often wonder if our not being Chinese is why he disregarded us. His wife and her entire family and, of course, their son is very Chinese culturally. Some don't even speak English. He learned Mandarin.
 

trinityroyal

Well-Known Member
JJJ, I'm so glad to hear how well everything turned out with Eeyore's school. And it's great that he was able to advocate for himself.

As to the N word, Janet, I agree with you. It's an ugly word with an ugly history, and I don't like the way people sling it around as though it's meaningless. I am mixed race, and look more black than any of the other parts of my heritage. I have been called the N word only once, and it stung like nothing else. I can't fathom how black people call each other by that name without taking a little chunk out of their souls with each use.

MWM, I can understand Jumper's perspective with regard to black boys. Ultimately it's more of a "culture" difference than a "colour" difference. I was born in Canada and raised around other Canadian-born people of all sorts of ethnicities. As such, I'm very comfortable with other Canadian people. Due to the demographics of where I live, most of them happen to be white. When I'm around people from Africa or the Carribbean, I feel out of place, in a large part because people feel that I should somehow magically fit in because my skin colour is similar to theirs. Add my iffy social skills to the cultural differences (different humour, idioms, eye contact conventions, etc.) and I'm often completely at a loss. I suspect Jumper feels out of place among black people for the same reasons I do.
 
L

Liahona

Guest
I think some very good lessons are being learned on everyones part. It's great the school and the kids are handling it so well.
 
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