LittleDudesMom
Well-Known Member
Today is difficult child's 18th birthday. It's hard to believe that my baby is now legally an adult.
That got me thinking about how dark things were when I reached out and found this site so many years ago. difficult child was raging almost daily at school. He was flipping desks and trashcans, running down the halls, and generally scaring all his classmates. He had no friends, his teacher resented him and he was diagnosis'd with depression (a spiral we believe was started with an inordinate increase of his stimulant and the side effects that accompanied that increase, i.e., lack of sleep, poor appetite, nervousness, aggitation, etc.). Having a daughter five years older without issues made me wonder what was so different about this child?
After the open arms of a number of members who are no longer here (Kris, Fran, Sheila, and Martie come to mind immediately) and also many of you who still offer support today, we began to make progress.
Now difficult child is entering his senior year of high school, has two best friends and a small circle of pals, has not had a discipline issue at school in a few years, has minimum supports through his ever-lessening IEP, has ranked up through the vigorous demands of his JROTC commanders, is a pleasure to spend time with, held down a full-time job this summer, makes decent grades in school, and basically shows very little signs of the dark, angry, suffering little boy he was that led me here 10 years ago.
Oh, he still very much a difficult child. Socially he is a good 2 years behind his peers, suffers from anxiety that we work on almost daily, is not fond of social situations, still needs prompting to stay focused and on task, and has a shorter-than-average fuse.
But all in all, ten years have brought him awareness of being and a level of maturity I just couldn't hope for in the throes of the dark times.
Things can get better. When I look at the passing of these 10 years they feel like "the blink of an eye" on the surface. But when I think back on them in terms of raising difficult child, I realize that we struggled inch by agonizing inch but have begun to see the light.
Happy 18th to my gig.
Sharon
That got me thinking about how dark things were when I reached out and found this site so many years ago. difficult child was raging almost daily at school. He was flipping desks and trashcans, running down the halls, and generally scaring all his classmates. He had no friends, his teacher resented him and he was diagnosis'd with depression (a spiral we believe was started with an inordinate increase of his stimulant and the side effects that accompanied that increase, i.e., lack of sleep, poor appetite, nervousness, aggitation, etc.). Having a daughter five years older without issues made me wonder what was so different about this child?
After the open arms of a number of members who are no longer here (Kris, Fran, Sheila, and Martie come to mind immediately) and also many of you who still offer support today, we began to make progress.
Now difficult child is entering his senior year of high school, has two best friends and a small circle of pals, has not had a discipline issue at school in a few years, has minimum supports through his ever-lessening IEP, has ranked up through the vigorous demands of his JROTC commanders, is a pleasure to spend time with, held down a full-time job this summer, makes decent grades in school, and basically shows very little signs of the dark, angry, suffering little boy he was that led me here 10 years ago.
Oh, he still very much a difficult child. Socially he is a good 2 years behind his peers, suffers from anxiety that we work on almost daily, is not fond of social situations, still needs prompting to stay focused and on task, and has a shorter-than-average fuse.
But all in all, ten years have brought him awareness of being and a level of maturity I just couldn't hope for in the throes of the dark times.
Things can get better. When I look at the passing of these 10 years they feel like "the blink of an eye" on the surface. But when I think back on them in terms of raising difficult child, I realize that we struggled inch by agonizing inch but have begun to see the light.
Happy 18th to my gig.
Sharon
to your difficult child..........
