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Regrets pressing Charges?
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 672574" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Welcome to the forum, FITS.</p><p></p><p>Your story sounds a lot like my story with my son, who is now 26. He stole from me as well. I turned him in once, and it was once in a series of arrests and jail sentences and homeless periods. </p><p></p><p>I can't tell you which situation helped turn him around, but he was in jail 8 or 9 times, has misdemeanors and felonies, was homeless some 5 times for long periods of time, and was in several rehabs. I called police on multiple occasions, including the times he threatened suicide. </p><p></p><p>I can't tell you what to do, but I believe my son was better off in jail during his worst periods. At least he had a roof, three meals and little to no access to drugs.</p><p></p><p>Your son has stolen quite a bit from you---more than my son even though he did steal from me and whomever he could. </p><p></p><p>We can't know the future. Today, my son is 26 and he has been on a progressively better path for almost 18 months.</p><p></p><p>Don't think you can control outcomes of any of it, because you won't and you can't. If my son stole more than $10,000 from me, I would have called the police.</p><p></p><p>When our kids are on drugs, there is nothing that will stop them from trying to get more drugs. Nothing. It's not personal about us. It's about their drugs.</p><p></p><p>Please do whatever you feel you need to do, and then, once you do it, let go. Start working to let go of him and any consequences (and believe me I know how hard that is to do, and how impossible it may sound).</p><p></p><p>Start working on YOU, and on detachment with love. There is a great post at the top of this forum on Detachment. I printed it out and taped it on the wall. It helped me a great deal.</p><p></p><p>We are here of you. There is hope for our adult kids, once they hit rock bottom and start to want to change. </p><p></p><p>In the meantime, we are here for you. We care and we understand.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 672574, member: 17542"] Welcome to the forum, FITS. Your story sounds a lot like my story with my son, who is now 26. He stole from me as well. I turned him in once, and it was once in a series of arrests and jail sentences and homeless periods. I can't tell you which situation helped turn him around, but he was in jail 8 or 9 times, has misdemeanors and felonies, was homeless some 5 times for long periods of time, and was in several rehabs. I called police on multiple occasions, including the times he threatened suicide. I can't tell you what to do, but I believe my son was better off in jail during his worst periods. At least he had a roof, three meals and little to no access to drugs. Your son has stolen quite a bit from you---more than my son even though he did steal from me and whomever he could. We can't know the future. Today, my son is 26 and he has been on a progressively better path for almost 18 months. Don't think you can control outcomes of any of it, because you won't and you can't. If my son stole more than $10,000 from me, I would have called the police. When our kids are on drugs, there is nothing that will stop them from trying to get more drugs. Nothing. It's not personal about us. It's about their drugs. Please do whatever you feel you need to do, and then, once you do it, let go. Start working to let go of him and any consequences (and believe me I know how hard that is to do, and how impossible it may sound). Start working on YOU, and on detachment with love. There is a great post at the top of this forum on Detachment. I printed it out and taped it on the wall. It helped me a great deal. We are here of you. There is hope for our adult kids, once they hit rock bottom and start to want to change. In the meantime, we are here for you. We care and we understand. [/QUOTE]
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